The Quagmire

Busking For Nothing and your Chicks For Free

2010-03-09T20:47:00.000-05:00

First, special thanks to Jose Marquez. Everyone needs a friend like him. But not everyone deserves one.

You've all heard of American Idol. I apologize for bringing it up and in no way think that show has any redeeming value. However, in the same vein TfL (Transport for London) is now having a competition to allot some busking licenses. This is either insane or brilliant or rubbish. I haven't decided, though after last year's trip I can tell you the buskers need improvement. One guy was playing to the accompaniment of a boom box, only the boom box was doing most of the work. Competition URL here.

I am still Canadian and was reminded of Tom Brokaw's awesome piece on Canada that was shown on NBC during the Olympics. It was well received. Conveniently, it's now available on YouTube and is an awesome seven minutes of film. Famous people you might not know are Canadian include Tom Brokaw, Neil Young, Doug Henning, Dan Aykroyd, Raymond Burr, Michael Cera, Yvonne De Carlo, Howie Mandel, Monty Hall, Alex Trebek, Shannon Tweed, Keanu Reeves, and my only famous relative, fourth cousin William Shatner. I apologise for the last bit.

The London Eye is ten years old and this article talks about how it came to be. It's amazing that something like this has turned into an iconic structure much like Eiffel Tower. I rode it on it very soon after it opened in addition to visiting the Millennium Dome and while it was much maligned, I loved it. The eye on the other hand has been well received and is insanely popular: deservedly so.

In other news, Pink Floyd has filed suit against EMI. Pink Floyd claims their contract prohibits selling their songs as "singles" and only album sales are allowed. That means their distribution on Apple's iTunes and other sites that do not honour album purchases is in jeopardy. EMI claim that the contract only applies to albums whilst Pink Floyd claims album means that album in all formats be it tape, CD, digital, and whatnot. The article doesn't expand much, but this case will have industry changing ramifications because if Pink Floyd wins, and I hope they do, an artist will have creative control over their music. I agree, for example, Dark Side Of The Moon is one complete work and shouldn't be doled out as singles. If that is the artist's wish, then so be it. Though it does beg the question of radio play. (Apple is famous for refusing to sell albums on iTunes that can't be separated into individual tracks and only disallows single track purchases for songs longer than 10 minutes.)

Back to Jose: he's been very instrumental in getting The Quagmire ready for the Big Move. I'll warn everyone once it happens, but you will have to update your RSS feeds and any other place you may subscribe to this blog. We're going to be going to WordPress in the very near future. The blog may continue to move, but you will all be given a URL that will always work no matter where the blog goes. That URL will be http://www.darsys.org and it should point your browser to wherever the blog is parked. (The blog will remain on the same server but in a subdomain and subdirectory for the time being until I move from Dreamhost to Photon.net which will happen eventually.) I'd like to tell you how much I helped, but I think the work ratio's about 10% me and 90% him. If anyone wants to provide educational training to me on WordPress once I'm up and running, that would be great. I'm sure I'll have questions because my WP experience is pretty limited.

This blog should be relocated before the end of the month and a final post will direct you to where you need to go. All posts will be available in the new blog, though some formatting anomalies may occur. If you point them out, I'll fix them. With 830+ posts it's going to take me awhile to do it manually. Old posts will remain here for one year before I remove them to preserve inbound links and Google PageRank. We're going to do some fancy .htaccess page directs to send you to the new blog once it's up and running. Just for those of you who care about what will happen.

Eric's Huge Announcement

2010-03-08T17:31:00.001-05:00

This announcement is one of the happiest individual moments of my life: I can reveal the big secret I’ve been hiding for nearly a year. I am now officially and legally a Canadian citizen. Let me tell you all “aboot” it :)

I have always identified myself as half-Canadian* to people who’ve asked – everyone says it helps explain my obsessive love of hockey. My mother was born a Canadian though she has long since become a US Citizen. My father is an American. Me? I was born right here in the good-ole USA. From the viewpoint of the US government I am an American Citizen through and through. And indeed I have a US Passport, I have voted here, I live here, and I even pay my taxes here. And at the Olympics, I will report I’m for Team USA. Though this year I was mostly conflicted.

When I was growing up, the USA took a very dim view of dual nationals to the point of not recognizing them in most cases. Sometime before I was 28, I had the opportunity to elect to become a Canadian citizen. Sadly I just didn’t know it at the time.

I continued to identify myself as half-Canadian when asked, which was a state of mind more than a legal condition. About 20 years ago, I checked into becoming a Canadian citizen but the process was onerous as all hell. The document was nearly as detailed and as long as the US Government’s official security clearance document: encyclopaedic. I guess the idea is to keep most people from even from trying. It worked because mentally I wasn’t up to the challenge. I don’t know that if I had to go through the full, long process I’d ever have the mental fortitude.

Some five or ten years ago (give or take) I had emailed my cousin John who was in the Canadian government with their trade commission. He told me there was a small grace period, but I blew it. I missed it and there was no hope for me and there wasn’t much he could do to help at that point. It was too bad because by then the US begin a bit more leniency in accepting dual nationals. You no longer were required to give up US Citizenship if you claimed another by right of birth. That meant I could claim Canadian citizenship without losing my US citizenship.

Let’s go back to early last year. My friend Maury brought this to my attention when she saw this video on YouTube. (It's a really funny video, so check it out.)

A new law amending the Citizenship Act came into effect on April 17, 2009. The new law gives Canadian citizenship to certain people who lost it and to others who are recognized as citizens for the first time. It also protects the value of citizenship by limiting citizenship by descent to one generation outside Canada. The previous law required people born in the second or subsequent generations outside Canada to submit an application to retain (keep) their citizenship, and to either live in Canada for one year or prove a substantial connection to Canada before their 28th birthday. If they did not do either of these things, they would have lost their citizenship, sometimes without even knowing. The old law was criticized for being complicated, confusing, and leading to uncertainty for many people about their citizenship status. The new law simplifies rules by eliminating this requirement.

This clause only allowed about 100,000 additional people Canadian citizenship if they wanted it. It so happens I fell into this group of 100,000 people. (So does Maury). It’s not automatic and you must apply to resume your citizenship.

I immediately got all the paperwork, got some photos taken – and let me tell you those special photos were the hardest part to find down here in Florida. The documentation required was hefty, but I did it all and it wasn’t quite as overwhelming as the full application. I spent a few hundred dollars on international couriers and expedited delivery. Within three weeks I had submitted my application and kept this all to myself lest I jinx it. Only two people knew: Mom had to know because she had lots of old documents I needed such as birth certificates and such. And of course Maury knew because she’s the one who told me.

After Thanksgiving, about seven months later, I got the first word. The application was initially rejected because the Quebec birth certificate my mother supplied was the old style and they wanted the new style. Seriously. It’s the same information but on a different form. Four weeks and a couple hundred dollars later, we get the new one. Which is surprising similar to the old one but with a different seal. I re-submitted it. And waited. It’s important to note, they require the original documents and not copies.

Some four months later, I was checking online to find the status of my application and it didn’t show they received the new documents even though my tracking information showed they did. I felt stuck in limbo. In frustration, I sent a polite fax to the local consulate after they happened to be at a recent NHL Panthers game and I spoke to them. In the letter I explained the situation. They called me a few days later and told me that there are so many applications now that the wait can easily extend to two or more years. However, they were very nice and helpful and they gave me a number to call because the one on the website only works from within Canada.

I called today (4 March as this is written). Today is also Mom’s birthday, I was told my application was approved. I am embarrassed to admit, I was so happy I started to cry though the lady on the phone thought it was very nice that I was so emotional over it. I called Mom at work from work something I have never done except in the direst of emergencies, told her, started to break up again, and hung up because I was too embarrassed to try and talk.

So, as I said when I started this story, I am now legally a Canadian citizen: a dual national, fully recognized by both countries. I know it’s Mom’s birthday but I think I got the best present. She’s happy too. She’s the only one who knew the day it happened. Everyone else has to wait until I get my certificate, which is when you will all see this post as a blog entry. (My Canadian relatives will also get emails.)

Will I get a Canadian passport? I want one, so maybe one day. But not right now as I'm not sure I've got the patience to go through with that again. I am still an American and don’t need one though some of the places I travel it’d probably be more comfortable to use. For now, I will continue to travel on an American passport. More importantly, American law requires all US Citizens to use their American passport when you enter or leave the USA.

Will I move to Canada? Not now and not even soon. When I retire, it’s certainly an option. Right now, my home, my job, and many of my friends are all here. Leaving for anywhere else would be hard. Besides, I still want to retire to London one day. On the other hand, Sarah Palin is running for president in 2012….

Will I vote in Canada? I’m not sure. First, it would be unfair for me to vote in any election where I wasn’t properly informed. I’d like to fix that, so I suppose I should resume my subscription to MacLean’s magazine (think Canadian Newsweek) so I can at least hone up on local politics. Honestly, I am still not quite sure if I can vote as a Canadian living abroad since I only lived in Canada for about a year when I was a small boy and wasn’t technically a citizen at that time. I am receiving much conflicting information on this topic from various Canadian government websites.

I like hockey, curling, maple syrup, and I like the cold too. But I like BBQ and football too, and hate poutine. I know both national anthems from memory. I knew French but it's become worthless because I've not spoken it regularly in decades. I am an American and I am a Canadian. And I’m not conflicted about it in the least.

* My left half, I think.

Alice In Wonderland

2010-03-07T18:15:00.000-05:00

We saw Alice in ~~Wonderland~~ Burtonland today. After hearing all the negative comments on the 3D aspect, we decided to go for 2D. Alice was originally shot in 2D and the 3D was added afterwards. When this isn't done properly your eyes and your brain don't communicate and you can get headaches and/or nausea -- which is what a number of people were complaining about. I get headaches at most 3D movies anyway so this decision didn't bother me.

The film is directed by Tim Burton so if you're expecting normal, you've gone to the wrong cinema. This film is odd, unusual, strange, bizarre, weird, atypical, freaky, nutty, yet still pretty damn visually fantastic. And, indeed, that's what it is. The movie starts off in Victorian England as Alice is being betrothed unwillingly to a suitor. She espies the white rabbit and the film is afoot.

Many odd things happen once Alice drinks that first potion and you will be captivated by all of it. Whether you like it, I'm not sure. I mostly enjoyed the film but I had some quibbles with some of the odd story tangents. Loved the Hatter, Cheshire, and the Red Queen and we could have used more of them and less of the White Queen for sure. The bandersnatch was an awesome creature indeed besides giving me the excuse to say bandersnatch. The jabberwocky wasn't nearly as impressive.

The one brief dance scene near the end was terribly contrived and I'm not sure why it was even part of the film. Probably just an excuse to use the word "futter" in the movie.

There were two kids in our group (5 and 7) and they were fine with it, so I give this a green light to most audiences. I was secretly hoping my favourite Jefferson Airplane song would make a cameo, but it didn't. It would have been most appropriate.

Sorry this review is shorter than what I originally wrote but Blogger farted and ate it all.

As much as it pains be to thank David Streeter in public, this video link he sent me demands it. It was an amazing bit of nostalgia. The clothing, the vehicles, the traffic chaos, the atmosphere. The film is from a cable car travelling East down Market Street in San Francisco, just a few days before the infamous Great Earthquake of 1906. You can clearly see the clock tower at the end of the street at the Embarcadero Wharf on the Ferry Building that is still there today. Authentic, live-action hundred year-old film is a rarity so treat yourself to this seven minutes of history.

Lastly is this great article on cover songs. Many songs you know and love are actually covers. Aretha Franklin's legendary Respect, Tina Turner's Proud Mary, and even Elvis Presley's Hound Dog to name a few. Most covers of legendary songs are big blunders. Sometimes a cover becomes the canonical version. Next time you're trashing Marilyn Manson for ruining a song (as he richly deserves) don't forget that not all covers suck.

Special thanks to Jose as we continue to work to figure out the final details to move this blog to its new home. I will remind me readers to look out for the notification that we've moved. The new URL will be http://www.darsys.org/ if you want to bookmark it now. That URL will always point to this blog no matter where it moves. For those of you reading via RSS you will need to update your feed when the announcement is made and not before.

Having Sex With Your Hand (And Not Making A Mess)

2010-03-05T21:51:00.000-05:00

Yeah, before we get to the subject line, let me first mention a few real stories.

The most admired and trusted company in the world is? Apple Computer. Forbes, who conducted the survey says "this year generated the highest response rate in its history ... For the third straight year Apple takes the No. 1 spot -- this time by the highest margin ever." The nearest competitor on the list is Google. Say what you want, that's some survey.

Paul shares this link with me. Politics are a dirty business, but if you're donating to the RNC, you might want to see what they think of you. If you're in the DNC you need to see what you're up against. It takes a special sort of person to look slimier than a used car salesman, yet they manage it. I do not believe all members are like this, but it's sad this is done so openly with the base assumption that the RNC clearly thinks the people who donate to it are idiots. (Hey, wait, maybe I share something in common with them... ::laugh:: )

And, today, we have news of the absurd. I provide this instead of the huge, major, earth-shattering announcement I was hoping to release today. It'll just have to keep waiting until I can make it. I do have that special post written and I'll I need to do is release it. So, today, we have news of the absurd.

The Swiss have begun producing extra small condoms for use by 12 year olds. In the article it says: The Hotshot condoms, which cost about US$8 for a packet of six, have been created by Lamprecht AG, a leading condom manufacturer in Switzerland. A standard condom has a diameter of 2ins (5.2cm) in comparison with the Hotshot's diameter of 1.7ins (4.5cm). Both are the same length – 7.4ins (19cm). I really have no idea how I should feel about this. I think protection is important for people of all ages, but I don't think twelve year olds should be having sex except with their hand*. In fact, I know a few people in their 30s who shouldn't be having sex either.

And speaking of sex, a city in New Jersey has gone of the deep end. A family (mother, son, and daughter) made a snowman. In fact, it was a snow lady. A near perfect replica of the world famous semi-nude marble Venus de Milo — aka Aphrodite of Milo. Yeah, the same one every single kid has seen in junior high in art class. It's not obscene, and not even titillating**. Yet, amazingly, someone complained and they were told to tear it down or cover it up. There's photos of it (clothed and nude) in USA Today. So it's okay for USA Today (and BBC and the AP and everyone else who carried the story) but not for a front lawn. Someone needs to get a grip.

* And only if all five fingers give their consent
** TITillating. :)

The Big-Ass Concert Post To End All Concert Posts

2010-03-04T18:32:00.002-05:00

Mom had mentioned that my cousin Ken could rattle off every concert he ever went to. I'm just not that good with my memory in some things. However, I do save my ticket stubs and so I was able to compile this list. Venue names are the name of the venue as printed on the ticket at the time so some venues are listed under multiple names. If the date is hyperlinked, that will go to my review of the concert as posted in my blog. As you can see, I spent some time on this.

Artist	Venue (w/Location)	Date
Barry Manilow	Hollywood Sportatorium (FL)	10/18/1980
Bruce Springsteen	Oakland Coliseum (Stadium)	10/22/1984
Genesis	Oakland Coliseum (Arena)	10/19/1986
Bridge School Concert IV	Shoreline Ampitheatre Mountain View, CA	10/26/1990
Bridge School Concert VI	Shoreline Ampitheatre Mountain View, CA	11/01/1992
Paul McCartney	Citrus Bowl Orlando, FL	05/09/1993
Tina Turner	Miami Arena	08/22/1993
Elton John	Sunrise Musical Theatre	10/01/1993
Rod Stewart	Miami Arena	11/21/1993
Billy Joel and Elton John	Citrus Bowl Orlando, FL	02/21/1994
Jimmy Buffett	Sunrise Musical Theatre	04/13/1994
Phil Collins	Miami Arena	05/31/1994
The Eagles	Orange Bowl Miami, FL	07/24/1994
James Taylor	Sunrise Musical Theatre	10/21/1994
The Eagles	Miami Arena	02/25/1995
Billy Joel and Elton John	Joe Robbie Stadium Miami, FL	04/13/1995
Neil Diamond	Miami Arena	12/09/1996
Phil Collins	Miami Arena	03/03/1997
Elton John	Miami Arena	05/04/1998
Elton John	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	10/04/1998
Neil Diamond	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	12/18/1998
Billy Joel	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	02/02/1999
Bruce Springsteen	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	03/09/2000
Tina Turner	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	04/15/2000
Tina Turner	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	04/16/2000
Tina Turner	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	10/18/2000
Jimmy Buffett	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	02/10/2001
Neil Diamond	American Airlines Arena Miami, FL	02/21/2002
Crosby Stills Nash Young	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	04/13/2002
Billy Joel and Elton John	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	05/03/2002
Paul McCartney	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	05/17/2002
Jimmy Buffett	MGM Grand Garden Las Vegas, NV	05/25/2002
Rolling Stones	National Car Rental Center Sunrise, FL	10/22/2002
Elton John	American Airlines Arena Miami, FL	09/27/2003
Simon and Garfunkel	American Airlines Arena Miami, FL	12/17/2003
Simon and Garfunkel	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	12/18/2003
Jimmy Buffett	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	05/01/2004
Elton John	Royal Albert Hall London, UK	07/04/2004
Phil Collins	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	09/30/2004
Styx and Kansas	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	02/03/2005
Jimmy Buffett	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	02/19/2005
REO Speedwagon	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	04/07/2005
Elton John	Office Depot Center Sunrise, FL	05/18/2005
U2	American Airlines Arena Miami, FL	11/14/2005
Billy Joel	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	01/07/2006
Queen w/Paul Rodgers	American Airlines Arena Miami, FL	03/03/2006
Trans Siberian Orchestra	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	11/04/2006
The Who	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	11/20/2006
Bob Seger and The Silver Bullet Band	Seminole Hard Rock Hollywood, FL	01/11/2007
Trans Siberian Orchestra	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	11/04/2007
Van Halen	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	02/20/2008
Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	07/15/2008
Neil Diamond	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	10/26/2008
Tina Turner	American Airlines Arena Miami, FL	10/30/2008
Elton John	Caesars Palace Coliseum Las Vegas, NV	11/03/2008
Trans Siberian Orchestra	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	11/13/2008
Elton John	O2 Arena London, UK	12/31/2008
The Eagles	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	01/26/2009
Tina Turner	O2 Arena London, UK	04/07/2009
Metallica	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	10/01/2009
KISS	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	10/22/2009
Santana	Hard Rock Joint Las Vegas, NV	11/14/2009
Jimmy Buffett	BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL	02/27/2010

It's pretty complete though I can think of a few things that are missing like a 4th of July concert by Chicago at ProPlayer Stadium some time in the 1990s. Tina's listed six times but I'm sure the correct number is seven. I also think Neil Diamond's total is missing one too. I only included musicians so comedy concerts aren't included, nor are any mixed media shows. Everything listed was a full length concert.

I had a great deal of fun doing this. I really didn't grasp that I had seen over sixty concerts in my life. The first three were fun because I didn't have tickets but those were the first three concerts I saw in my life. And with the help of Google -- they know everything -- I was able to figure out what the dates were.

For those of you who went to any of these shows with me, feel free to add comments. If you know of any that are missing, drop me a note and I'll update the post.

Elton John wins with a total of 11 concerts (8 without Joel and 3 with). Tied with Tina at six is Buffett's but I think that one's correct. By venue the 31 shows at the same place win -- National Car Rental Center, Office Depot Center, and BankAtlantic Center are all the same building -- out of 62 shows that's an impressive fifty percent.

The Vatican and I Agree....

2010-03-02T20:09:00.000-05:00

... on something. Seriously. While they didn't check with me first, this article tells it all. It sort of relates to my infamous Led Zeppelin post by failing to mention Led Zeppelin at all. The actual article can be found on the Vatican's website in L'Osservatore Romano, the Vatican's official newspaper. If I'm going to invoke the Vatican, you know I check it first. They have given their blessing to a clutch of albums saying its top 10 ten albums would be perfect for anyone marooned on a desert island. Seriously. The list is noteworthy.

1. Revolver by the Beatles
2. If I could Only Remember My Name by David Crosby
3. The Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd
4. Rumours by Fleetwood Mac
5. The Nightfly by Donald Fagen
6. Thriller by Michael Jackson
7. Graceland by Paul Simon
8. Achtung Baby by U2
9. (What's the story) Morning Glory? by Oasis
10. Supernatural by Carlos Santana

This list is some fine music for the most part, though I'm not sure how Fagen's album fits in with rest. I can't imagine the Pope sanctioned this. Pink Floyd's awesome Dark Side of the Moon is a famous icon of stonerdom. Supernatural is heavy with overt sexual references. Morning Glory features a hit song about a drug cocktail (Champagne Supernova if you don't know). And it includes a Michael Jackson album which begs all kinds of jokes that I'll skip for now. But, I will agree with the Vatican. If stuck on a desert island, you could do much worse. I am pleased the Holy See has given its blessing to these fine albums.

In the ultimate irony of all time -- I challenge anyone to beat this -- Bill Clinton offered his support to Tiger Woods with his marital problems. I don't even know where to begin. This is a punchline to some joke that's too far out for me to even comprehend.

'Bacon-trepeneurs is a term coined for this article on how bacon makes everything better. Who can argue? Nobody, of course. You can go on and on about how bad bacon is for you and everything that's wrong with it. Yum. Tasty.

I need a date to the Paul McCartney concert. I have bought two tickets at face value and as of right now, have nobody to go with. Offers accepted from all real fans....

As I said before, I am very happy for Team Canada and which them the very best with the gold medal they clearly deserved. My sole complaint is that whiney bitch Sidney Crosby. He'll be even more insufferable now. Can you even imagine it? In his new contract he's likely going to ask for a private bus just to carry his ego from game to game. █ ♥ █

I find it hard to be rational with Crosby. He's a true diver and he whines about everything and while his skill is undeniable, his antics cheapen the game. He whines to the refs, he whines to the media. And he's soft as hell, though this year he's actually had a little resemblance to a man instead of a woman. As Kathy says, "Man up princess and hit him with your purse." He just irritates me ever so much. Hell, Malkin on the same team is a much better overall player. Sid's been anointed and it's gone to his head. Shut up, Bitch, and just play hockey. Want to see his diving ways? Go to this YouTube video.

Hockey (Olympics, Panthers, NHL, and so much more)

2010-03-01T19:42:00.000-05:00

The Olympic gold medal game USA versus Canada became the highest rated television program in Canadian history. Period. Over half the country watched. I think that's great but ratings in the US were through the roof too, with 27.6 million people watching (more than the entire population of Canada) and the highest rated hockey game since the 1980 Winter Olympics. It was big stuff by any measure and if the NHL has a brain -- oh, shit, we're doomed -- they'd use this wave of popularity and ride it to new heights.

Instead the NHL is still not getting regular coverage other than a few games on NBC here and there in the tail end of the season. DirecTV and Versus are still in a pissing match while the station stays dark, leaving NHL fans no way to watch many games from out of market teams. The story begins here but the good news is, that Sports Illustrated reports a deal should be worked out this month.

The NHL plays Russian roulette with its ratings and others play Russian roulette with chat. Josh Lowe posted this on his Facebook account, and I wasn't going to watch. I'm not much for online chatting. I ended up watching it and it was fascinating. The video is just under six minutes and while I have no interest in the chat roulette service, the video is an interesting exercise in understanding what makes people tick. I like social experiments so the video's worthwhile.

Still keeping with the hockey theme,I continue with another comment about the Florida Panthers team management (I use the term loosely as they couldn't manage to claw their way out of a paper bag). As my blog readers know, I was at the Jimmy Buffett concert Saturday night. I'm a big fan and I had a blast. I mention it because, it's quite fun and there were lots of people tailgating.

Tailgating. That's something that a great group of Panther fans started to do a few years back. Some of those fans were and are good friends of mine. After a few games the 'authorities' came over and complained about the cooking saying it was not allowed according to local ordinance or something along those lines. The tailgates continued without the cooking. Then the tents and tables had to go after the 'authorities' complained, again because, they said, there was some local ordinance.

Honestly, that's when I stopped going. When is a tailgate not a tailgate? Hard to say but they lost their appeal for me when it became a bunch of people standing in an open concrete parking lot. Nothing against those that enjoy it, at all. I support them, am happy for them, and still sometimes go by and say hello to them. I support fans that are trying to be fans especially this group because they are among the most loyal fans in the building. The team should be supporting them too. Right? Absolutely. A number of them are my friends, as I said, and I know they're good people.

So, my question is that if they can have grilles, tables, tents, generators, and swimming pools (yes, swimming pools) at a concert, why can't they at a game? The place was crawling with police looking for lawbreakers. It got me to thinking: what if Panthers Management was lying about this alleged ordinance? They have a long, long history of lying to and misinforming fans. It's the reason they have no credibility with fans, though their heads are stuck so far in the sand they don't realize they have less credibility than Osama Bin Laden trying to sell used cars. While I'd like to blame Yormark, I can't do that because I'm not sure where this policy came from, though it's got "yor marks" all over it. If you've ever been stopped by a copy who yells at your for speeding on "his road" you've got the idea with Yormark. When you talk to him, it's "his building" even though the building belongs to the city of Sunrise.

After the concert, I was so bugged by this, I decided to do a fact check. I'm good at those. I went to the City of Sunrise website to look it up. I went to the codes and ordinances page which in turn links you to a searchable database at MuniCode -- and come to find out there is no ordinance prohibiting tailgating. None. Zero. Trust me, I looked up very possible word. Tailgating is perfectly legal in the City of Sunrise.

Someone's lying and I'd love to know why and who. It's not the city because it's all there and black and white for any citizen to read. It's a law or it's not a law. It's not a law. Google searches show a number of people who were harassed by security (not law enforcement) and told there was such an ordinance. This is quite interesting, to me. An on-duty police officer enforces the law but there is no such law. And the fact that the parking lot of the recent Buffett concert -- like many concerts -- is full of tailgaters, and police doing their jobs making sure everything is orderly is pretty visible proof of this. What I don't understand is why does Panther management care? What's the big deal? Same parking lot but more people and it's okay. There's a logical disconnect here.

So Panthers Management doesn't want fans of our team to tailgate but it's okay for concert goers to do it? Can anyone tell me where the logic is? This team does so many things to alienate fans and this is one more example. If you are (or were) a tailgater at the Panthers games, maybe it's time for you to ask some questions. Just sayin' because you guys deserve to have fun because you're a team asset. If you live in Sunrise, this is your tax dollars at work. Ask your commissioner, ask the mayor. It's your legal right as a citizen to demand and get answers.

I have started something new. It's called "Where's George" and you enter serial numbers from your currency into your account. You optionally stamp your bill with the URL. (I've ordered the stamp). I was first told about this by my friend Liz and just sort of watched her with fascination but not much interest. You spend your money as usual, take it to the bank, or whatever it is you do with your money. Other people enter their bills and you can watch your money travel around the country. Here's a report for one bill I entered; it's the only one I've entered that has a history, but I am encourage. With an account you can search by state, zip code, denomination, reserve bank and more. It's free and I think it'll be fun. (It's against the rules to exchange bills with friends to increase your hit rate -- it's a real project trying to track money. So like Seti@Home, please don't try and scam the system.)

Gypsies In The Palace: Jimmy Buffett Concert Review

2010-02-28T14:04:00.001-05:00

I saw the 2010 Summerzcool Tour final date at BankAtlantic center last night (27 Feb) with Evan, Brenda, Greg, Gaby, Mom, and Karen.

We started at Renegade for and early dinner. We were there at 515, Karen followed two minutes later, John and Liz right after that. Evan and Brenda brought up the rear. I've only reviewed Renegade about ten times in my blog and it's still just as good as ever. John and Liz attended dinner with us while Greg and Gaby didn't. I had the Native Plate this time and while the ribs were excellent and tasty, they were a tad greasier than usual. I managed to finish my entire meal, something I usually can't do there because the portions are so big. Everyone but me had take-home bags.

Mom and I got to the BAC and the lot was damn near full. If you've ever been to Buffett you know most of the people got there at 2pm and have been drinking heavily ever since. I ended up finding a spot near A52 because someone had packed up their tailgating stuff to go in. It was around 715pm. $30 for parking if I didn't mention it.

Mom hadn't been to this type of Buffett show before so the parking lot was a bit overwhelming for her, I think. It's like a huge football tailgate where people are having twice as much fun and ten times as drunk. One guy had put together two igloo coolers, two sets of wheelbarrow wheels, a pair of bicycle handlebars, a motor and made a train. He was riding the first cooler and drinking from the second. I do not believe this is legally qualified as 'drinking and driving'

You've all seen the closet alcoholics who have the funnels with a tube that forces booze down their throats, right? This crowd had then but the funny one was where there was a uniformed Sunrise police officer pouring in the bottle of booze (Vodka or Gin as it appeared to be or maybe crappy white rum?) for the guy because he couldn't do it himself.

Karen -- who came in elsewhere -- saw someone come out of the bushes. I won't share what they were doing but I'm just saying on the "A" lot maybe you don't want to walk through the bushes ever again.

We passed all the Margaritaville stands which were handing out free samples of food and drink. Nice. We were way too full to partake.

We went in and the rocket scientists had the ticket collection booths so far in they were blocking the swag line and it was causing issues. We checked out our seats, took a lap, and then finally (20 minutes later) the rest of the lot began showing up.

The whole time before the opening act, there was the usual platoon of people throwing t-shirts, playing with beachballs, using the bamboo basketball hoops, and otherwise having fun. The set was minimal. You've seen it before. Stage, bamboo beach theme, three large screen displays -- two on opposite sides for the people in the cheap seats, and one for backdrops.

Promptly at 8pm his Holiness, the Head Parrothead, came out and introduced Ilo Ferreira who did a fifteen minute opening set. He was excellent. From me that's high praise because I'm usually critical of opening acts. How good? He's a male Nadira Shakoor. Really.

The beachballs continued, as they did throughout the first half of the show, as Parrothead in Chief, Buffett took the stage at 817pm. He spent the whole show running his songs as part of the "Summer School" scene from class to graduation to diploma, and so on. Some of the connections were really weak, but it wasn't the point.

He also talked about this being a hockey arena and how he was playing on ice. He had a few words to say about Tea, USA along with some video clips of the Olympics hockey. Apparently he's a fan.

The most entertaining part of the show wasn't the show. It was the "lady" in front of us who was quite literally too drunk to stand. She got up, swayed about, and fell back down into her chair, usually with the help of her seatmates. In spite of this she continued to drink more and more. Long about mid show she lost the ability to keep her head upright, and like a newborn, it just lolled from side to side and front to back.

Post show, there was beer on my jacket. Lots of it. Dry cleaner for that. Courtesy of the guy behind me. Ass.

We left at the end of the first encore because we knew there was only one song in the second. Normally I don't do that but this was one of the drunkest crowds of any show I've ever been to and we didn't want to be on the road with them. Greg and Gaby were first out before the encore. The rest of us were out as Brown Eyed Girl wrapped up.

Evan provided me a link to Buffet World (I'd never heard of it) to get the missing songs from the set list below. I wasn't able to remember them all or in order.

OPENING SET:
01 Lage Nom Ai
02 License to Chill
03 Summerzcool
04 Pencil Thin Moustache
05 Conky Tonkin’
06 Son of a Son of a Sailor
07 Boat Drinks
08 Volcano
09 Cheeseburger in Paradise
10 Come Monday
11 Wings
12 It’s Five O’Clock Somewhere
13 Rhumba Man
14 One Particular Harbour
INTERMISSION (Short one, too!)
SECOND SET:
15 My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink and I Don’t Love Jesus
16 Cuban Crime of Passion
17 Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes
18 Last Mango in Paris
19 Let Me Love Again (an Ilo Ferreira song)
20 Gypsies in the Palace
21 Surfin’ in a Hurricane
22 Southern Cross
23 A Pirate Looks at Forty
24 Margaritaville
25 Fins
FIRST ENCORE:
26 Nobody From Nowhere
27 Brown Eyed Girl
SECOND ENCORE:
28 Tin Cup Chalice (Solo Acoustic)

One of Jimmy's most underrated songs is Gypsies in the Palace which he did. The first bit he did in the "style of Leonard Cohen" and it was a very interesting take. I'd like to hear him do the whole thing like that. This concert was good, classic Buffett. Welcome home, Jimmy. Don't stay away so long next time. (His last visit here was 2-19-2005 which I also attended, I believe.)

You all saw Google's awesome SuperBowl ad about a guy falling in love. One of the better ones in terms of actual art in years. Someone's done a brilliant take on it involving computers. Same music, same concept, different search terms. Check it out.

Suzie-Q blogs this item. It's a real excerpt from a sex education article for girls from the 1960s. Yeah, the 1960s. It's not that old.

I don't have words to describe how amusing I found this. Does anyone know where this woman is or how I can find her? Nice laugh. Thanks Miss Q! :) A larger version by clicking, full size on her website. Go take a peek and give her a comment of thanks for that great bit.

Stan hasn't made my blog before. I've known Stan for decades. It's his first appearance but this video is the funniest commercial of its kind I've ever seen. It's by Axe body wash and called "Wash Your Balls" which should give you all the warning you need.

Once again, the Miami Herald made an IT'S error in today's print story about last night's horrible Heat game. The Herald really needs to hire some editors who know grammar. This is a regular occurrence, but I no longer write and complain because last time I did they wrote back and argued with me that they were right. They were not right. Period. Now, I just mock them. (Sorry, Rob, Dave, and anyone else at the Fishwrapper, but your paper has some flaws that continue to get worse.)

If you use Open Source programs from Linux to Open Office to Gimp to Drupal to Wordpress to anything in between, you really need to read this article because you could be affected. It's from London's Guardian newspaper, a reputable source. In it, "an influential lobby group is asking the US government to basically consider open source as the equivalent of piracy - or even worse .... the International Intellectual Property Alliance, an umbrella group for organisations including the MPAA and RIAA, has requested with the US Trade Representative to consider countries like Indonesia, Brazil and India for its Special 301 watchlist because they use open source software .... Special 301 [is] a report that examines the adequacy and effectiveness of intellectual property rights around the planet - effectively the list of countries that the US government considers enemies of capitalism." I was going to write a long analysis and then add that here, but I don't think that's necessary. This is just obviously insane. One recommends you do not take this lightly and keep a careful eye on developments.

Killer Whales are not Whales. Dammit. Orcas.

2010-02-26T21:23:00.000-05:00

Before I get to the interesting stuff, I want to follow up on a post from yesterday. I taught the management company my HOA employees a valuable lesson. My final message to them was that if I didn't hear back by 10am I was going to file a formal complaint with the State Department of Professional Regulation. I did so at 10:04 today via fax. At 10:37 the lady who handles our community called, I lit into her like there was no tomorrow. She's coming to "reinspect" the property Tuesday. I may have one of the neighbour's dogs come utilize the back yard so she has something to step in. They can't fine me: I don't have a dog. Anyway, I told her I had sent the complaint in. Some ten minutes later her boss called and asked what transpired, I gave her a slightly friendlier version of the treatment. I also told her that I had sent in the complaint and told her to learn a lesson. I don't make threats. I make promises. Actions (or lackthereof) have consequences and your broken cel phone doesn't relieve you of those consequences. It's not over yet.

Once in a blue moon Microsoft does something good. Yesterday they shut down a huge bot network responsible for 1,500,000,000 pieces of spam e-mail every day. I have not noticed any major change, sadly. While I applaud their efforts, I am still reminded that their operating system flaws are what made that network possible.

I rarely post jokes in my blog, but this one's a riot: Mark McGwire said he's saddened his estranged brother wrote a book that chronicles their use of performance-enhancing drugs and reiterated his claim that he only took them to heal from injuries. Oh, wait, that's a serious news story. Mark McGwire so needs to get over himself. Nobody believes you. You are a stain on baseball. I don't much care about baseball as I'd much rather watch the grass grow because it's far more interesting, but all my baseball friends think you're an embarrassment, though many of these same friends seem ready to forgive Pete Rose, so that makes them suspect.

From Sue, there's this video which you should watch. If you own any four-wheel motor vehicle manufactured by Toyota in the past decade, these are instructions on how to stop your vehicle in the event your car's accelerator gets stuck. The odds are low, but it's your life. Spend the few minutes and watch it.

Daniel Radcliffe's a decent person. I'm always surprised at such revelations as I harbour secret suspicions about celebrities that they'll turn out to be raging assholes like Mel Gibson. And the one's that aren't assholes tend to be a mess like Amy Winehouse. He just did a PSA for the anti-suicide Trevor Project and it says this in the article: "I have described myself as being 'gently eccentric' and slightly different as a person just because I've had a very different set of influences growing up than anybody else in my peer group did," the 20-year-old Radcliffe said. "I've always felt very lucky to have the life that I've had."

Failblog makes another appearance here. This sign made me laugh. Move along, now.

Josh called me yesterday (yay) but I was asleep and less than coherent. He wrote a post on his blog about Tilikum the "Killer Whale". They aren't whales, you know. They're called Orcas and they are big, mean dolphins. Seriously. They aren't whales. They're really ornery versions of Flipper. Look it up. Learn something.

Josh's blog entry says, "there have been four deaths from killer whales in the last forty-eight years. How many has Tilikum been a part of? Three of them." What do they expect? This is just like the occasional lion keeper who's eaten by the lion. I don't know why people are surprised. These are large predators and you look like an appetizer to them. It's no different than a house cat who looks at you and decides you've outlived your usefulness. (All cat owners have experienced this moment in time where you realize that the cat has designs on you and they aren't pleasant.)

I think the cross-project BOINC thing is working and TEAM CMOT should now appear everywhere. I hope.

A Meeting With Stu Siegel

2010-02-24T19:57:00.000-05:00

The Geography of a Recession is a very short presentation which will scare you. It should. Thanks Paul for this one. Keeps the economic "recovery" in perspective.

I received for the umpteenth time the "Dear Dr Laura" letter. The contents is true, though the origins of the actual letter are unknown. I removed the name of the alleged author because he claims to not have penned it. Please note that Dr Laura is not qualified to speak on most of the topics which she speaks on, especially theological ones such as raised in this letter. See Snopes for details. On her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination... End of debate. Its in the Bible - end of argument!

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how best to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is, my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2. Clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wriggle room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Anyhow, that's just out there to put things in perspective. Just because it says so in the Bible, doesn't necessarily make it so. Just like if it says so on the Internet also doesn't make it true. In fact, you can probably bet good money the Bible's more trustworthy than the Internet.

Courtesy of Wil Wheaton we have Timmy O'Riley by L. Hadron and the Colliders. Making music was never this awesome! Using only the Bliptronic 5000, Guitar Shirt, Drumkit Shirt, Stylophone, and Otamatone Electronic Instrument, L. Hadron covers Baba O'Riley by The Who. All real geeks will click that link. The name of that band is awesomely double-plus geeky.

Our wonderful TSA has issued a great memo to staff. If you fall down due to heart failure or some other medical ailment, and the TSA agent comes to your aide as a good Samaritan, they will be fired. I am not making this up. The memo also points out that the TSA will not provide first-aid training to its officers, that any officers with such skills wanting to help passengers in distress must get themselves “excused from security duties by their supervisor or manager”, and that Good Samaritan activity is “working outside of your job description” where “you are not covered for medical or time loss through the Occupational Workers’ Compensation Program”. (Italicized bit from the Economist's Gulliver column which is linked above.) I understand security is first, but that's just a bit much for me to stomach. Read it all, shake your head, and wonder what our government has come to.

My stupid HOA of which I was formerly president served me with three violation notices today. They're hiding from my return phone call which wasn't very nice. First, they claim my house is not painted in the correct colour. It's the same colour as the day I moved in 15 years ago. I also have proof they're insane on this. I have the original colour book they provided. This is the second time in five years I've been served with this same notice. The second notice was for cleaning my roof. Um, my roof? The new one I put on less than two years ago? That roof? They're smoking crack, and it's not even good crack. The third one, they are complaining about the back patio. I'm sure their complaint would be legitimate if you could see it from the street. But a back patio isn't visible from the street. Oh, wait, I don't even have a back patio. I think that's a problem. Anyone want to tell me how to humiliate these fucktards? They have failed to return two phone calls and left me on hold for 14 minutes. One lady whom I asked to take a message said "company policy doesn't allow us to do so" -- WTF?

Lastly (first lastly), my friend Josh -- yeah, I still have friends -- found an interesting tidbit about one Danish curler, Madeleine Dupont. She’s posing for a calendar and it’s for charity. And she's one hot curler. I like curling and I've been watching a lot lately. I did the same last Olympics too. I can't tell you why I find it appealing but I do. And I've never actually seen Ms Dupont on TV, so she's got nothing to do with it before you raise that unseemly -- but plausible -- accusation. Speaking of curling, still without Madeleine Dupont, Suzie-Q found this AP video link. You can read Josh's original comments on his blog.

Lastly, (second and final lastly), I had my big meeting with Stu Siegel the new Managing Partner of the Panthers today. This won't interest most of you except for the hockey folks, so if you're not interested in the NHL, you can go now.

I had written Mr Siegel after a "last straw" moment and requested a meeting. I pitched myself and told him why he should give me time. I told him that I'm a charter season ticket holder, worked for the ECHL Matadors for a year, wrote a weekly column on the Panthers for nearly three full seasons for LCS: Guide to Hockey, and that I ran this message board. I ended the request with, "That is why you should listen to me." I then waited for a reply.

I received one Monday and he agreed to meet me Wednesday. That's today for those of you keeping track. I went to this meeting prepared. I had a 19 page, perfect bound, full colour presentation. I wanted to leave him facts. I came in with three copies of the book. One for Siegel, one for his partner Mr Vimer, and one for Yormark who I was assuming would crash the meeting. I left Siegel two copies: one for him and one for Vimer. I still have no use for Yormark. Almost every ticket holder I speak to thinks he's a cancer that infects the organization and I don't think Siegel realizes it or accepts it either. I explained it nicely verbally, and not as nicely in the packet.

The packet contains a seven page letter detailing what is wrong with the organization broken down into a few distinct categories. With most points, because I named names and made claims of inappropriate performance, I included facts. There were links to online websites where evidence was provided. I also included printouts from team message boards and local media. If you're going to make a case that something is happening, it's best to prove it. I am not going to go into specific details, because I don't feel that would be appropriate. But I will give you the general gist of what happened.

It all started 11 Feb 2010 when I went to the game with some people from ITW, number 148 on the Fortune 500 list. They made some comments about the arena that I've heard before. But because these were not only business associates, they were very loyal, long-term Blackhawks fans they were especially telling. It was the last straw and when I contacted Mr Siegel.

This is from the packet and doesn't cover what actually happened in the meeting:

First, I pointed out the downward trend started with the departure of Jeff Cogen. While many people didn't like Mr Cogen (I liked him), he did get the job done. I first went into detail about how the organization disrespects our hockey traditions. A common complaint is that people can't tell there's a hockey team there when you're walking around. While I made a few suggestions, this wasn't the point of my meeting. If they want suggestions, I'll give them suggestions. I volunteered. And I will help.

I went into how the organization conveys a "don't care" attitude. It starts with the typos and grammar errors that litter the scoreboard, advertising, and food menus. Then it's the people who don't return phone calls: sadly that's most everyone there.

Then I went into how the organization disrespects the fans. I explained clearly that perception is reality. That means since the fans feel that way, it's true. Even if they don't feel that way. In the packet I pilloried Mr Yormark on this one point:

[Yormark is the] most universally derided among fans for his attitude. I am using a personal experience on this because it just so happens that this promise was seen by just about every fan in the building. On both the Official Panthers board and my own message board I mentioned I was having a meeting with him< .... we had the meeting earlier this year, and I thought it was productive. I won’t say we agreed on everything but I thought he and I at least came to an understanding. I blogged about it here so you can see my thoughts. At the end, he said he’d read my suggestions on the plane and follow up with me in a week. It would be very hard for me to prove he said it, except he blogged it .... That was 19 May 2009. It’s been nearly a year and I’ve not heard back. Where’s the accountability in that

I went on about how they fail to communicate even when they do things right. For example, if someone asks you to do something, let them know it's been done. Otherwise how will anyone know you took care of their email/call/etc. I went on about how scheduling these meetings and giving people one day's notice is inconsiderate of their schedule.

I used Mindy's situation as an example of how they disrepect their own fans. You can find Mindy's post over on the message boards. Better you hear her words than mine. She's a class act, a great fan, and that she would be treated that way is horrible. (The team apologized after I gave her links to make complaints but it should have never happened.)

I brought up the legendary and infamous Body Slamming Alice article because it's important that the team knows that some people think they're better than everyone. No fan should drop and F bomb in front of a child. The fact a team executive did it, and then fired the employee who told them to stop it is inexcusable. If this is the public face of the team, why would anyone want part of that organization? I mentioned more examples of failure to communicate with other people. It's important that I not pick on any one person.

People think I have a grudge against Mr Yormark. I categorically deny that. I think he does a great job at selling advertising, sponsorships, and all that. I just happen to dislike him because I do not think in an organization that relies on the fan base for their financial gain they should have a Machiavellian liar in charge. And that's who's in charge.

One comment as proof they don't get it: Urinal Pucks with team logos. Epic fail.

My final point was that hockey should be left to hockey people. "Hockey and management must be separated by an iron wall. Cohen, Yormark, and everyone else (yourselves included I’m afraid) need to stay out of the way." I don't think they get that because Yormark has his fingers in that too. I can promise you Yormark simply doesn't know enough about hockey do the job. He's a smart guy, but you need a smart hockey guy doing that. Yormark's not a hockey guy.

Okay, that was the packet summary. Now on to my meeting. I introduced myself again, quickly reminded him why I was there and promised not to to discuss the hockey side. (I did later mention that if they did trade Tomas Vokun they had to buy me a new jersey....)

Stu is a hockey fan. I want to make that clear. He asked where I sat, and I explained why we sat there. I also explained why we're relocating for the upcoming season and that we gave him back his 'free' tickets in exchange for that relocation. We talked about Mindy a bit. We talked about Chad -- I said nice things about him except his inability to return phone calls. We talked about Brad -- again, I said nice things about him too, again except for his failure to return phone calls. With Brad, especially it's frustrating because he did the work. We just didn't know he did it. You think after messages from three people he might have had that little light go on and say "maybe I will call" -- what do I know. Again, no beef with Brad or Chad.

We discussed Murphy. I told him that was the sort of fan he needed in the building. A nice guy, a loyal fan, a home, and a Pollyana when it comes to the Panthers. That's all good things for a home-town sports fan. Murph's my friend and I am not criticizing him in any way. I pointed out that even Murph is frustrated and that if they're losing the hard-core die-hard fans, things are going really wrong.

I pointed out that the problem is not the on-ice product. We have had several coaches, two GMs, and a whole slew of players. The team is being infected from things not related to hockey. The fans are part of it, or the lack of fans more accurately. I tried to convey to him repeatedly that the reason there are no fans in the building is because they don't feel welcome, it doesn't feel like home to a team. I'm not sure he realizes how true this is. How am I so sure? Last year they gave away tickets for free to anyone who had a local driver's license. FREE. Nobody came. That means no ticket revenue, no concession revenue, no eyes seeing sponsor ads, and no life in the building.

This building (the store out front excluded) if you walk around it's hard to tell this is a hockey arena. In fact, you'd probably never guess. When you go to a concert you don't know there's a hockey team there. And you should. I've been to many arenas, and ours is better than Tampa's because they have the worst hockey arena I've ever been to. But I've been to Chicago, Dallas, Atlanta, New York, among others and those building you can tell a hockey team plays there even when one isn't. Hell, I've been to minor league building over the years that are better including Estero and Orlando.

I suggested he survey fans using Surveymonkey or some other site. I am confident if he asks the right questions, he'll see how right I am and how wrong they are. He said he welcomes suggestions and I do hope the fans who feel the management has ruined this building with their de-pantherization, with their "screw you" attitude, write him and share their views. The more people who express this, the better.

We took a little walk, looked at Mindy's suite then at the ice which was mid-conversion for a concert this weekend. I thanked him for his time, urged him to read the packet carefully, and then, if he had follow ups or needed help, to contact me.

Mr Siegel is very hard to read. I'm usually good at it, but I'm not sure what he was thinking or feeling. Did I like him? He seemed okay. It's hard to know most people in 35 minutes. I certainly don't have a bad impression. I didn't get that "icky" vibe that I get with others. I think he's sincere in his desire to fix what's wrong. I don't believe we necessarily agree on "what's wrong." I can tell you he does care. He's like Jeff Cogen that way. He cares about the team and he's not faking -- that's the reason I spent my valuable time with him, because when it comes down to it, I care too.

Today's Random Blatherings...

2010-02-23T20:54:00.000-05:00

Miami is famous for sick people. It stands to reason with our über high average age in the Sunshine State. It's odd to see your home-town hospital in the news in a foreign paper, but indeed it happened. Danny Williams, the premier of Newfoundland and Labrador, broke his silence on his decision to undergo heart surgery in the U.S., and the controversy it caused. Same hospital where I've had some operations and procedures. Nice to know it's well regarded. It also shows a huge failing of socialized medicine. He could have had it there, but he'd rather pay and have it here. Socialized medicine is good for many things but it's not a panacea.

My Mac now has 8GB of RAM. Damn. So much RAM so little need. It does make some things run more quickly, for sure. Like all RAM it didn't work the first try, so I switched the order of the DIMMs and voilà, it worked.

Via Grant, there's article on Wired about how Google's PageRank has changed and is about to change again, striking fear into all those spam-bastard SEO companies. A very, very long read. Take in the first page if you're pressed for time. There's about ten more pages if you're geekily oriented. Most of you won't be.

And here's a post I really liked over at "God Hates Protesters" which I've plugged before. This one's awesome. A small thumbnail here and the original over there if you click on the thumbnail.

I think this makes a great point. Too bad it's lost on so many people. I hate the haters.

Tomorrow is my big meeting. I hope it goes well. And if it does, I hope I can post a lot of the details here for you all to read. If it doesn't go well, you'll definitely hear all about it.

Enjoyed my chat with Murphy. Looking forward to this weekend with friends and Mom. Ate too much crap for dinner and ma feeling bloated. And now it's time for Lost. It's the final season. I'm excited and sad about that.

Captain Eo Returns

2010-02-22T19:23:00.000-05:00

First, from Steve we have this video of someone busted stealing WiFi. You only need to watch the first half unless you want a lecture on unsecured networks. But this lady is a riot -- not only is she busted, she's proud of it. And admits she's cheap. Gotta love her honest dishonesty. (I've been guilty of doing this in hotels when they charge $25/day for access and I just want to check my emails for a minute or two.)

In news that makes me happy the legendary film Captain Eo returns to Disneyland later this month. What makes me happy is that means if it's well received, Disney World will follow. Captain Eo began quietly disappearing from parks after Michael Jackson's well publicized troubles. In 1998 it left the last park (EuroDisney). The music is awesome, the choreography is great, and I'm sure it's going to seem retro and kitschy, but I'll still try and see it when it makes its way back here.

In work news, I had a vendor write me an email telling me that because we sold a specific brand of competing product, they wouldn't sell to me. Now, I find this interesting for several reasons. First, they declined to provide any company policy showing this is a legitimate policy. Second, they do not enforce it unilaterally. As it so happens, the FTC has a specific page for reporting allegations of anti-competitive practices. I have sent a printout of the email to the CEO of the company and told him I'd like his take on it before any further action is taken. To be more accurate, they told me they were going to cut us off from this particular product in spite of the fact I've sold competing lines for decades and that my competitors also do the same. I contacted both current and former employees of this company and they all deny any such policy is in place nor do my competitors have any knowledge of any such policy. And what they said verbally -- not in writing -- would be even more illegal. My question to my blog readers, was I right to assume the CEO of a large company ought to be notified there's a problem so he can correct it, or should have I just filed the complaint directly. I like to assume the CEO doesn't know his employees are behaving like this. (This company is rumoured to have run afoul of the FTC several decades ago for similar practices. I have no proof of this.)

I remodelled my FarmTown farm on Facebook. Yay me! I've also totally re-done my permissions there and made additional changes. I hope it's working now. I just have to figure out which permissions stick if someone is in two groups.

USA 5, Canada 3: A Game for the Ages

2010-02-21T22:30:00.000-05:00

The USA versus Canada hockey game was one of the best ever. Intense, exciting, invigorating, captivating, energetic, awesome! This game is what all hockey games should aspire to be. It's definitely one of the five best I've ever seen. Probably the second best and only because I must give the edge to the 1980 Miracle on Ice game for sheer historical importance even though that game wasn't nearly as good.

This game judging by all the comments and interaction with my friends, they all agree that this was the best or one of the top few games they've ever seen. The media seems to agree, or at least the media that's weighed in so far. And, as all athletes should know, never run your mouth off leading up to a game. It usually ends just like this one: foot planted firmly in mouth.

It's nice to see players give it everything they have with zero laziness. Even that whiny bitch Sidney Crosby tried, though I am pleased he left disappointed. My Canadian half was a little sad, but overall this game -- the first US victory over Canada in about fifty years if my history serves, left me feeling very satisfied and satiated. I'm not looking forward to the return of the NHL after the Olympics, since it can only be a let-down.

If the NHL was smart -- and they're a bunch of effing idiots -- they'd capitalize on this game. This is what makes this sport great. Get out there and communicate it. The Panthers should do their part to capitalize on this upswing, but they're just incompetent and unless it's selling advertising, they'll just screw it up.

Rumour has it, this take of the Herb Brooks speech was played as motivation.

Face Plant

2010-02-21T19:30:00.000-05:00

I shall start off with an embarrassing story. I went bowling today -- got three of my worst scores in memory -- with Timmy. Karen did a no-show. So Timmy goes first and, since there are no practice frames, bowls a lousy five in two balls. I am amused, so I go up slide forward and do a face plant -- both knees and my face. I figure I'm a total idiot and on my second ball, I almost do it again. The second frame results in abrupt stops in this once place. At that point we realize, there's a patch of wood they replaced and there's something wrong with the surface but due to the location, it can't be avoided. We move over to lane two, and that problem goes away. I was sore most of the first game, and I barely broke a hundred. The second game was much better, though still inadequate. Sadly, a crew of rugrats at their parents arrived mid-second set and having a lack of bowling courtesy, it wasn't very fun for us. We finished our third game and called it a day rather than put up with their inconsideration.

Up next is this article. I forgot whose Facebook account I found it on, though. It's an article on censorship and I rather liked the perspective it offered over what things tend to offend people over time. Banning books is never a solution. If you think it is, you're definitely part of the problem and not the solution. The article starts "Books should offend you," a professor told my literature class 30 years ago, when I started college. "They should make you squirm and sweat. They should keep you up at night." That's a great opening and he's right. Huckleberry Finn, a book that offends lots of people for lots of reasons is also a great work of literature, yet it's banned often. In fact it's the third most banned book of all time. It's also one of my favourites.

The author concludes, But I can't understand why we need to shield our kids from these bad feelings. Why, oh why, must everybody feel good? Literature should make us squirm and sweat, because that's when we really start to learn about the world, which is a messy and disquieting place.

Amen.

I've set up a private message board for members of Team CMOT on the Seti@Home project. To view it you must first register for the board. After you do, you'll also need the password to access that particular area. The password is available from me and only to members of Team CMOT. Just email me when you register and I'll activate your account and provide the password at the same time. We gladly accept all sentient beings as team members. (The team should be cross-platform by the time you read this, so any BOINC project will qualify, not just Seti@Home.)

Dinner: Burgers. No vegetables, no fruit, nothing. No bread, no cheese. Nothing but meat, salt, and garlic powder.

Monster The Book Review. People From Texas.

2010-02-19T19:58:00.000-05:00

I like my pharmacist. I went to pick up my refill last night at Walgreens. He wrote me a note with a little happy face on it. I smiled. When was the last time your pharmacist made you smile? Yay Vinay!

Everyone has a friend who's gone off the deep end over the wrong sports team. I have one such friend. And he's a dentist. I won't mention Stevenson's name here because it'll just go to his head. His daughter's in this video but that's not why you should watch it. You should watch it because it's got a great message and a catchy tune.

My friend Josh posted this to his Facebook page. It gives you perspective as to how deep the Mariana Trench really is. It's to scale and very impressive. I was going to put a thumbnail here, but even that is scarily large. Keep in mind, Mount Everest would fit inside easily and still leave a mile of space unused. Take a gander.

Mark Fischel has this tidbit which is awesome to help educate the people of the fine state of Texas. "Nearly a third of Texans believe humans and dinosaurs roamed the earth at the same time, " says the article invoking images of Fred, Wilma, Barney, and Betty. Another 30% admitted to not knowing. Only 41% of the people in the state of Texas realize this isn't true. It's the other 59% that scare me. Damn. If you're from Texas, help spread the word. These people ought not be allowed to reproduce -- help protect the gene pool.

Oh, right, a book review for everyone. I just read A. Lee Martinez's Monster. I found this book as I was exiting the Borders at the Galleria Mall in Fort Lauderdale. I was just about to exit when I saw this odd, toxic yellow cover with an odd logo. It was catching enough I decided to actually pick it up and read the blurb. I was intrigued. It seemed quirky. It's some weird cross between science fiction, horror, and fantasy. I am unable to characterize it or categorize it. It's quirky in Fforde sort of way and is funny in a Pratchett sense but not like either of those authors. This is not Martinez's first book but I liked it enough to consider other titles.

This is taken from the back cover blurb: "Monster runs a pest control agency. He's overworked and has domestic troubles - like having the girlfriend from hell. Judy works the night shift at the local Food Plus Mart. Not the most glamorous life, but Judy is happy. But when Judy finds a Yeti in the freezer aisle eating all the Rocky Road , her life collides with Monster's in a rather alarming fashion. Because Monster doesn't catch raccoons; he catches the things that go bump in the night. Things like ogres, trolls, and dragons. Oh, and his girlfriend from Hell? She actually is from Hell."

Monster's Girlfriend Liz is a succubus, his sidekick is a paper man named Chester, and more unusual characters than you can shake a stick at. And like all novels in the genre they end up having to save the world. Much hilarity ensues between the drama. One of the reviewers on Amazon compared it to Christopher Moore's The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove. That may be the closest comparison anyone's come up with.

Lastly, a reminder for those on Facebook who continue to make posts that say "I wish there was a dislike button so I could click on it" -- I remind you there is one. Just add this to your browser. Now available for Firefox and coming any day for Internet Explorer. (Though it does beg the question why anyone actually would use IE.)

Dick Cheney Is Right....

2010-02-18T19:14:00.000-05:00

.... Yeah, for a change. Maybe for the first time. He called Barack Obama a one-term president and I think he's going to be proven right. The Economist Magazine is calling him a failure in its latest issue though they certain feel he can change this still. If there were an election today with Obama and a viable candidate that didn't offend me, I wouldn't vote for Obama. My disappointment with him grows daily. He talks a great talk, but there's nothing behind him. He's done nothing, he's rapidly losing his supporters because his floor is littered with broken promises. It's not that he doesn't mean well, but he is learning you can't change Washington in a day or even a year. He's made promises he had no way of ever delivering on. Too bad. He meant well, but I do not think there's a change he'll be re-elected if he doesn't accomplish things and make some massive changes.

My next disgruntled comment about our government pre-dates Mr Obama but I don't fault Mr Bush either. The Department of Homeland Security, the people charged with protecting us, has lost a few guns. They've ended up in the hands of gangs and criminals. These guns were lost because many were not properly secured, left in unlocked cars, and so-on. How many is a few? 200. As the article says, "It reflects the competence of the officer." Nice work, guys. If an officer loses a gun because of incompetence, fire the officer. Seriously.

Speaking of security, Reuters has an interesting article on Apple's security. Fake Steve Jobs picked up on the article as well and has a snarky title to go with it. Blogger's spell checker dislikes the word 'snarky' for the record. And while we're on the subject of Apple -- don't you love how I related the threads together -- there's this great piece from Fake Steve Jobs. The point on his Apple vs Google comparison is also worth considering: We charge $99 per year for a MobileMe subscription. Google gives you the same stuff and all they ask for is, um, permission to totally invade your privacy and to “monetize” your personal information. You think your personal information is worth less than $99 a year? Then you’re getting a hell of a deal with Google. The rest of us would rather spent $99 and keep the contents of our email to ourselves. That is absolutely true, and don't forget it. Google isn't any better or worse than any other company. You get their products for free, but you give something up for them. That's why I don't use Gmail and why I disabled Buzz. It's not why I'm abandoning Blogger, though that is soon to happen if I can get it worked out.

In an unusual move one of the largest Seti@Home crunchers in the world has offered himself up for auction. He's #21 in the world. Steve from our team bid $200 to lure him to our team and I threw in another $50 -- donations go to the Seti@Home coffers. The thread is here. I posted that yesterday. Today I got an e-mail from someone saying "Good ... he'll be your burden if you win. We don't want him anymore" Interesting. How harmful can having someone on a team where most members don't know each other, where we have no forums, where we don't talk, nor even email regularly. Weird. Sour grapes perhaps? Dunno. Mostly amused, I guess. If I were a dick, I'd send the email to the guy we're bidding on. But I won't.

Next up, a rare work-related post. We don't have a work blog or I'd put this there. We will have a press release at some point but it's not ready. Together with a Taiwanese partner, I've designed a new screw. We took the German version of their screw, added some special features, and made some adjustments for the US market, and did a few other things to ensure the best performing screw money can buy.

It's fully patented and the parts are due in about two weeks. A few of my friends have seen this page. It was available for weeks, but it was private until it was released earlier today. It's now on-line for everyone to view. I can't begin to tell you how awesome this screw is. I've played with the prototypes. We've got about a quarter million or so coming in on the first order and we're very much looking forward to seeing how the market reacts. If any of my friends want a handful to try at home -- they're especially great on decks -- shoot me an email and I'll bring you some. I'll give blog readers a 15% discount for orders placed prior to their arrival at dock if you mention the blog when ordering. There is a video of the screw as well (scroll to the bottom of the SKT page).

I'll quote from our page: "The features of the patented SKT-II® BiMate screws are many: from the specially designed patented SKT-II® BiMate cutting notch, to the self piercing point, the screw is designed for rapid installation. The special angle, asymetrical High-Low thread grips the wood surface preventing slippage and the low thread is serrated to prevent the wood from cracking. In addition, we've added a type-17 auger point to help in applications that require it. We've incorporated a Quadrex® drive which means you can use a Quadrex® bit, a Phillips bit, or a Square (Robertson®) bit without trouble. And, on top of that, on screws 1-5/8" and longer we've added a type-U knurl above the thread to increase performance. It's self-countersinking with not four, but six (6) self-countersinking nibs. To guarantee no corrosion problems will manifest themselves, this part is made out of 316 (A4) stainless. The screw is then dry-waxed for lubricity. And to be sure you're getting the real patented SKT-II® BiMate screws we've headmarked the part with both the SKT mark and the A4 mark."

Facebook Privacy, Cooking Cats, and We Are The World 2010

2010-02-17T22:12:00.000-05:00

In an unusual move one of the largest Seti@Home crunchers in the world has offered himself up for auction. He's #21 in the world. Steve from our team bid $200 to lure him to our team and I threw in another $50 -- donations go to the Seti@Home coffers. The thread is here.

This paragraph is upsetting and cat lovers may want to skip it. I rarely decide I hate someone without a lot of information. I've decided to make a special exception for Giuseppe "Beppe" Bigazzi who told his viewers how to make a cat casserole on his TV show and admitted to eating cats. He's been suspended from the show indefinitely after a deluge of viewer complaints. His critics included Health Ministry Undersecretary Francesca Martini. "Cats are pets protected by law," Martini noted, specifically against "cruelty, maltreatment and abandonment." Italy's National Animal Protection Board president, Carla Rocchi, announced she had instructed its lawyers to begin proceedings against Bigazzi for inciting cruelty to animals.

Speaking of cats, the latest Simon's Cat video is out here. As always, it's clever and funny and sure to bring a smile to your face.

And here's a nice English take on the French from BBC4. Having experienced this firsthand, I wholeheartedly agree with the article. "In France your waiter expects to be addressed formally as Monsieur, in exactly the same way he will address you." It's an expert commentary on the French, especially the Parisian, psyche. Well worth the read. Seriously.

We Are The World, the song Lionel Richie, Quincy Jones, and Michael Jackson put together 25 years ago to help the starving Ethiopians has been re-recorded to benefit Haiti. The official video is on YouTube but please pay for a download at your favourite music site or buy it in your favourite music store. Don't steal this one. Please?

Yeah, the original's better but this one has a certain nice je ne sais quois about it. Give it a chance. Pay up.

Facebook has been taking a battering on privacy issues lately, and here's a great guide to total and complete customization of your privacy settings. I've not done mine yet, but I'm about to. I think it's important. And, for the record, I've disabled Google's Buzz service as of today. I don't trust it.

A quick shout out to Pablo. We did take out at the Chik-Fil-A and came home and watched USA v Switzerland men's curling and Germany* v Sweden hockey.

I've got more, but that's all for today's blog.

* Yay, me is on this team.

In life there are winners and....

2010-02-16T19:21:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure how I feel about the name of the site, but this post is pretty awesome #99 Grammar. Bottom line is pretty much every group has grammatical morons. Judging from the comments on the Led Zeppelin post, stoned people have a far more difficult time grasping grammar. Even high-falutin executives can't handle basic grammar. Anyway, the post is amusing. Read it or don't.

Team CMOT over at Seti@Home has gained a new member. Yay, us! You're welcome to join, so come on over.

I finally saw the luge video of the death of Georgian Olympic Luger Nodar Kumaritashvili. It's not gruesome, but it's certainly shocking. He's alive, he's tossed into a wall body splaying every which way, and he's dead. No blood, no gore. Just death. It's still up over at CBS -- where I saw it --but NBC has finally pulled it. (CBS' video only shows the actual accident and none of the post-accident mayhem.) It just goes to show that in life there are winners and lugers... (Ouch. Is that too soon?)

EMI music is in financial trouble and has put Abbey Road Studios up for sale. The article says Paul McCartney hopes it can be saved. Um, Paul, you're worth £440 million pounds at last count and could afford to buy it yourself. Buy it and give it to me. I promise I will appreciate this legendary place more than anyone else who buys it. I've blogged about Abbey Road before so I won't say anything else except that I hope it's preserved.

Ikea Airlines, Sarah Palin, and Joe The Plumber Comes Out

2010-02-15T20:35:00.000-05:00

Before I start my actual entry, this was sent to me be a few people and deserves to be here. First credit to Paul. A much larger version of the image without the added text is here.

Yeah, that kid would be me. It's the sort of thing I'd say. Fail? No. It's a WIN!

Now on to politics. I am not a Republican. I think everyone knows that. I am socially liberal and fiscally conservative. That would put me somewhere in the middle. Mostly I prefer Democrat candidates because it's hard for me to vote for most modern Republicans. I have friends who are Republican and I actually understand why they feel the way they do and I respect their opinions. We disagree on a wide range of topics from abortion, to gun control, to gay marriage, to economic theory but everyone is entitled to an opinion even if it isn't mine. No big deal, friends manage to be friends despite disagreements all the time.

I didn't think McCain was a bad choice for president and he'd certainly have done a far, far better job than the nutjob before him. I was okay with him until he picked that offensive creature as his running mate: Sarah Palin. I do not understand how anyone finds her remotely of value as a candidate. First, she makes Bush Jr look like a liberal. Second, she makes him look smart and that's no mean feat. Other than her looks and homey personality, "where's the beef" to quote Clara Peller. She's bad news. Even "Joe The Plumber" came out against Palin today.

As much as I hate Obama's wiffle-waffle totally worthless healthcare "reform" package that will do everything except reform the system, I'd prefer another four years of his so-far ineffective administration than one second of Palin. I'd rather Bush come back. Seriously. I had a lot of hope for Obama. I really did. I never did like his health care plan, though we do need one. So far, though he's done nothing. We've got the making of another Carter. A really nice guy, but totally ineffective. Anyway, enough politics. You can read them elsewhere in this blog. I just happened to see Palin's face today and became nauseated at the thought.

Ikea is going into the airplane business. I know, I didn't believe it either, but this came from both Dave and Sue who sent it to me. If Ikea didn't design that plane, who did? I thought so. This is a South African airline, BTW. If you want really large versions of the pictures click these links and then you can click "view all sizes" and "original size" after that: Picture 1, Picture 2 , Picture 3, Picture 4 , and Picture 5.

I am itchy, headachy, and tired.

Eleventh Grade Burns: The Chronicles of Vladimir Tod (Book IV)

2010-02-14T18:15:00.000-05:00

A bit about foreign policies before my regular post. I read The Economist magazine (along with Time, Newsweek, Aviation Week, Rolling Stone, and Entertainment Weekly among others) because I like to read and to be informed about various topics. This one just intrigued me. In India a local non-governmental organisation has invented a new sort of zero sum which, it hopes, will leave everyone better off: the zero-rupee note. What on earth is the point of that? The note is not legal tender. It is simply a piece of paper the colour of a 50-rupee note with a picture of Gandhi on it and a value of nothing. Its aim is to shame corrupt officials into not demanding bribes. A great premise to be sure, but will it work? Read it and see.

Before Thursday's hockey game, I bought and read the latest entry in this excellent series and am hoping it doesn't end with the next tome, Vlad's final year of high school. Each book has been better than the one before it and this one is no exception. Author Heather Brewer is batting 1000 here. I'm not quite sure where neon orange figures into the cover art, but I feel like I need to comment on every cover. I think it was meant to be orange flame, but instead it's just odd.

We have the same cast of characters as before. Nelly stays in the background and we focus primarily on Vlad and Otis. This is their story, though Joss makes a return with cameos by Eddie Poe and Meredith. I find Meredith just to be irritating. Vlad continues to experience more teenaged vampire angst especially when it comes to new drudge and/or squeeze Snow. But the books is plot driven and is more tightly focused than the others as Vlad becomes more self confident as he deals with his missed relationship with Meredith, his longing to rekindle his friendship with Joss despite the fact Joss still wants to kill him. Otis is on trial with the penalty being death, but there's a bit of a twist with that I don't wish to spoil.

And Auntie Heather is an evil bitch queen for her cliffhanger of an ending that comprises all of one word. I saw everything in the book coming. Everything. Except that. Evil, I say. Evil.

In my review of the previous books I complained that Vlad still cries more than any other male character I've ever met. I doubt it was my advice that caused her to fix it, but he's not so weepy and I'm glad. I really like Vlad -- if he were real, he's the sort of person I'd get along with and be friends with. Not enough Vlads in the world. Vlad appears to be modelled on her own son though I've got no proof of that.

I said before Joss is a fascinating character and I wanted a whole novel about him. In Ms Brewer's blog she sort of said this might happen and I look forward to that with great anticipation. She also endeared herself to me by being a hater of those sparkly-vampire things.

This story, as I said, is more tightly wound and while it's fast paced she doesn't seem to be in a huge hurry to where it's going. I'm glad, though I still wish she wrote about 100 pages more per novel. Maybe she'll re-do the series in a director's cut. I'd read it again if she did.

Last time I said: Good book. Buy it. Read it. That advice stands.

The Panthers Just Suck. Seriously. It's THAT Bad.

2010-02-12T19:19:00.000-05:00

Apparently I'm (in)famous now. As you may know I got special tickets to heckle Jay Bouwmeester mercilessly on his return to Florida 5 Feb 2010. Getty Images* sent a picture of me over the newswires and it's here in this article on Yahoo Sports. Or just see the image here:

"Florida Panthers fan holds up a sign for Jay Bouwmeester of the Calgary Flames for his first visit back to Florida on February 5, 2010 at the BankAtlantic Center in Sunrise, Florida. The Flames defeated the Panthers 2-1," reads the caption. While Jay didn't read the sign as far as we could see, a number of his teammates did and that's good enough, because we know they told him his special fan club was in attendance. Sadly, the Panthers lost that contest. However, we had fun for two periods of the three until the Panthers threw in the towel. Which leads us to the next topic.

I am going to discuss something I've already discussed over on my message boards in this thread. A few short weeks ago, the Panthers were as high as sixth place in the conference struggling to stay there. They've slipped down to twelfth, and are in danger of settling into last place. And not just in the conference, but in the league. Today the "Managing Partners" of the Panthers wrote an open letter to their fan(s). Click that link to read the letter, and my comments follow there. I'm going to go a bit further here, though.

As I said, that letter is an important document, historical in at least one sense. Over time many teams have performed badly, but the Panthers have been trying harder than most to be bad. This in spite of the "Managing Partners" promise of accountability. This is the first team in professional sports I've ever seen that has sent a memo to fans that admits we suck which is what it says. "... our team, the way it is currently structured, is not equipped to meet the goals and objectives that we have set ...." That says we suck and there's no getting around it either. And it's 100% true. We suck, swallow, and beg for more. It's embarrassing to me and my fellow fans what passes for hockey on the ice.

The team doesn't care and it shows. Management doesn't care and it shows, this letter notwithstanding. The bottom line is that despite the "Managing Partners" moniker, Alan Cohen still owns this team and the pile of festering, steaming shite it has become. This goes back to the basic issue, nobody on this team, the management, or anyone involved has any clue why the team is like this. It's still like this despite changes in coaches, general managers, players, and more. There is one constant, and apparently I'm one of the few that can see it. When our season is over on 11 April 2010 (no playoffs for us), I will contact Cliff Viner and Stu Siegel, and if they agree, I will tell them what's wrong with the team. The problem is, and I know this in advance, they won't want to hear it because sometimes the truth is very painful. A cancer such as this team has spreads and getting rid of the infected parts doesn't cure the problem -- you have to kill the source, and quite frankly, Alan Cohen doesn't have the balls to do it: he's the most wishy-washy vacillating owner I've ever seen**. I have no idea how he ever ran a successful business.

A very, very sad fact: I care more about this team than any one person in management. I say that unreservedly, unconditionally, and without exception. I have no desire to get into hockey operations, and while it may need some fixing, that is secondary to the malaise that infects our hockey team.

The letter goes on to say, we're rebuilding. This is our fifth rebuild (give or take) in our short history. None of the others have worked, and this one won't either. I'm throwing that out in front of everyone right now. I'm willing to bet anyone one year of my salary that this next one will fail too. Because they aren't addressing the underlying malady, the source of our internal plague. Because they don't see it. I'm not sure if they saw it, if they would fix it. I realize my words here are harsh, and it would be great if someone in management would read them. (If they do read them, please note I will gladly say these same words to your face. And, given the opportunity, I will. What I say in private will be polite, professional, and brutally eviscerating. But if you listen, it'll do you some good.)

The letter also indicates they're keeping our coach (DeBoer) and general manager (Sexton). I can see a bunch of our local fans rolling their eyes and thinking how bad an idea this is. It's a great idea. DeBoer is not the problem, though he probably should take his frustrations out on the players a little more. If I were to build a hockey team from scratch, DeBoer is the sort of man I'd want behind the bench.
Sexton, well he's sort of green but I think he deserves a chance. I think he's got good hockey sense
and his ego doesn't get in the way (unlike, say, Keenan, who Cohen had on our team not once, but twice). These "Managing Partners" are behind DeBoer and Sexton because they say "After consulting with ... Sexton ... DeBoer" -- you don't consult with people you intend to fire. And "Sexton has begun the process of reshaping this team" Good. I'm happy with this.

The letter then states, "these changes are part of an overall plan" -- then share it with us, please. This team has been rudderless a long, long time. I'm a charter and inaugural season ticket holder. I've sat through almost every home game this team has played in over fifteen years. (In the first ten years I only missed a total of three games.) I know hockey and this isn't it.

As I said, after the season is over -- okay, it's already over if you want to be technical -- I am going to contact both Cliff Viner and Stu Siegel. If they agree, I will ask for a one hour meeting with nobody else in attendance. Just us three. I will tell them what's wrong, what they need to do to fix it. And I'll give them proof. Just to make sure they understand I really do know what's wrong with this team. I won't hold my breath because current management of this team says they care, but they really don't care. They have proven that repeatedly to me and many other fans. And they're too self-centered to even realize it. (Now, please proceed to beat your heard on the wall repeatedly.)

* While Getty Images may claim copyright to this photo, I deny that claim. First, it's a picture of me -- taken without my express or implied consent. Second it's a picture of my sign to which I lay copyright claim, and for which I gave them no permission to use or reproduce. So to hell with them.
** Here's a guy who had Jacques Martin as coach and GM. He asked many fans to a town hall style meeting. Then he asked what we thought while admitting he had no idea what he was doing. Pretty much every said JM should go. Cohen then laid the decision on someone else. Who? Jacques Martin. Yeah, the guy was allowed to decide his own career at the team. He opted to stay as GM. He should have been shown the door. The real point is that the owner of the team needs to have the balls to make the decision. He doesn't.

Things Of Randomness

2010-02-10T21:54:00.000-05:00

My guest bathroom now has new fixtures: nice brushed pewter things to replace the ugliness that was there before. My downstairs bathroom also has a new fixture to replace the ugliness that was there before. I've also got a new flapper in the downstairs commode to replace the wonky one. I am pleased with the results, mostly, but not the time it took to get it all done. One would have assumed that when I bought the parts, that Moen parts are interchangeable and that's why I stayed with the same brand for the showers. Amazingly, even the plumber was shocked that the units installed currently were non-standard so he had to do some really funky stuff to get the handles to fit. (He could have done it properly but that would have involved knocking out the wall -- so he had to do it all through the existing hole knock-outs). Thanks to Andres for introducing me to said plumber.

Many moons ago, I made a long post here called "Why Dell Sucks and Blows" -- since that time we've been replacing all our Dells with non-Dell machines. Some of the Dell units were scrapped and not replaced -- our employees can use personal laptops now so some of our units were redundant. The long and short is that we have two Dells. My Dell is the oldest one in the company at about seven years. The IT budget at our company has been frozen for all but essential purchases. I was cleared to replace my Dell. It's going to be an HP and I'll be going from a 2ghz P2 single core to a 2.3ghz 2x2core P4 with double the RAM and more ports and more HD space. Then I'll spend 20 years trying to get my crap moved from one PC to the next. Still, it'll be worth it. I'll replace the last Dell later this year. One at a time. Joy.

Thanks to Jose who's been putting up with my incessant confusion over Blogger's virtually no notice abandonment of all FTP hosted blogs. I'm going to pay him and if he can't, I've got someone lined up.

I have something stuck in my teeth. Tomorrow's a hockey night.

I miss Mo, Erin, and Josh -- in no particular order lest I cause offence.

Super Bowl or Super Usurious Price Gouging?

2010-02-08T22:59:00.000-05:00

The biggest complaint I heard (repeatedly) from the visiting fans besides the glacial pace of concession stand speed was the pricing. With sandwiches and subs at $22, fries $6, soda $7, ice cream $9, water $6, beer $10, chicken fingers $10, nachos $8, pretzels $5, and so-on, the complaints are valid. A number of my friends didn't believe my tales of the prices and happily one of my photos of the prices came out. (They're now on digital LCD screens so they can change the price by event.)

To all of you Saints and Colts fans who swore vitriol at the Dolphins please note that these are not our usual prices. Our prices are the same overpriced rate you pay at your stadium. These "super" prices were set by the NFL and its concession partners and not the local team. You should complain to the NFL about your financial rape in these economic times. It was disgraceful. I was, as I said previously, one of the few there in a Dolphins get-up and I was the recipient of many such complaints. The fact that people went out of their way to approach me and ask what the hell was wrong with us, with our stadium, angered me, because it wasn't our stadium, our team, and certainly not our fans. This was my only negative experience but as today has gone on, and others who've gone to the game have called me, e-mailed me, it has become apparent this was a real sticking point. (I got chicken fingers, fries, and a soda -- total price $23. Yes, that's $23 for a glorified Happy Meal.)

On a related note, I've posted a new batch of SuperBowl pictures on Flickr, my last, and the link is in the box at the left if you want to have at it.

In other news, while I haven't registered I tried "Where's George" again after a few years. Liz does this and I really should registered, though I am loathe to get sucked into something new. Where's George is a website where you type serial numbers of the currency (US bills only) in your wallet and it tells you where they've travelled assuming others have typed the serial numbers as well. My hit rate is 1 out of about 30 typed in but it's still fun in a weird sort of way. Give it a shot and let me know what you think.

How'd you like to turn your work or school papers into toilet paper? Or maybe your Panther tickets or renewal notice. Via my friend Paul comes this C-Net article with a video of a machine that does that, automatically. He asks what the ROI is? I say priceless. Didn't you always want to tell a colleague his paperwork was worth shit? Now you can.

Who Dat? Geaux Saints! (Dedicated to Carey Alice Tews)

2010-02-07T23:31:00.001-05:00

First, congratulations for the New Orleans Saints on winning the Super Bowl. I wanted them to but didn't expect them too. I'm glad because they deserve it, and dare I say are entitled to one. In spite of their mostly crappy defensive showing at the game.

(I have lots of pictures but they may not be on Flickr for a few days.)

As late as Thursday morning I was still unsure I could go to the game. I was told I might have ticket(s) available to me but not where or how many or even a guarantee. I wasn't worried because even if I had one, I knew some other people who were going to the game. I ended up going -- if you know where Evan usually sits, it was two sections over and five rows higher: just under the scoreboard on the far side even with the sideline. Pretty much the worst seat in the house. But, it's the SuperBowl. I wish I had gotten a ton of tickets because I had lots of friends who wanted them, but my Dolphins rep said I was lucky to get even one ticket considering the waiting list had over 5,000 people on it for just a few hundred tickets for the home crowd. Most were singles scattered about the arena. Again, it's the SuperBowl.

I ended up going in one car with Evan. With parking passes at $75 for the parking all the way at 199th Street and the Turnpike in the lots on either side of the Turnpike, two cars was a joke. The closer lots were $250 and $500. He was due at my house at 10am, but arrived at 930. We went to breakfast at Original House of Pancakes, then to Publix to buy food thanks to the slight relaxing of the no-tailgating rule. We then went back to my house to load the car.

We left my house a little after 11am, arriving at the stadium parking area near noon. The lot wasn't that full despite having opened at 11am. It didn't get full until close to 1pm. Note to self for next time. We ended up having a French Canadian park next to me, and I only point it out because after the game he was pissing on my tire. Seriously. (Evan claims it was the tree near my car, but I disagree.)

We prepared to go in, ditching all camera cases, binocular cases, and everything else that was on the banned list. The list that they changed three times this week. Not cool. We finally decided to go in to the fan area and kill time as you can only sit in the parking lot and be bored for so long -- without a tailgate it's just not so fun. And we kept getting pestered by people selling legitimate items (lanyards, programs) and counterfeit items (hats. T-shirts, towels, lanyards).

We went in, got in the security queue. They first make sure you have a ticket, then they glance at your for obvious no-nos such as large bags, coolers, mortar shells. Next up they check your ticket again, make you throw away all food, water, etcetera (in spite of the instructions saying sealed bottles of water were okay). Then you get patted down. Then you go through airport style security. I emptied my pockets and threw everything into the bucket as instructed. Went through, all was well. Evan's belt buckle (smaller than mine) kept setting it off so he got a hand-wand search. We collected our stuff and went through. Only then did I realize in my other pocket I still had a pack of 4-AA batteries. Nice job by the metal detector. Fail. They were handing out Pepsi Max Zero for free on the way in.

We then went to the port-a-john which was repulsive by any description. I only mention it because you figure the NFL which is so image conscious, might have had someone there to clean them. After that, I showed Evan the Super Bowl Ring collection (see ProBowl post). We meandered about, watched the tail end of the Daughtry concert (from behind the stage as we didn't have a ticket). Next we went into the ~~shlock shop~~ merchandise store. Sadly they had nothing left in my size. Judging by the $35 t-shirts, $80 and $130 polo-shirts, and $150 hoodies, and $600 jackets walking out the door, you'd never know the economy was in bad shape.

After that we went into the stadium where our tickets were check again. We wandered a lap around the lower bowl peeked out into the Stadium and shot some photos. I found an $80 shirt in my size that should have cost $25 tops but I bought it anyway. Then after that, we went up to our bowl where we took a lap or two. A number of Saints fans were thanking us for our city showing them hospitality. (I should mention that we didn't coordinate it but both wore Dolphins stuff -- maybe 20 people in the arena did). I like the Saints fans and it's cool to hear those Cajun accents.We eventually worked our way to our respective seats.

In the arena, they showed a tape of parts of the Daughtry concert and also the Steve Winwood concert. Later, there were warm-ups and finally Queen Latifah came out and sang American the Beautiful. She was followed by Carrie Underwood performing the National Anthem. So boring a singer is she. They should have reversed them. That was followed by a fly-over by F18's (I think they were anyway). Then kickoff. One fan mentioned the stars were aligned for a New Orleans win, and I hoped he was right.

We were in the Saints half of the stadium -- most of the tickets clearly went to the Saints organization. Maybe 90/10 Saints fans. Oddly, in the Colts section it was 70/30 so the stadium was very Saint heavy. I never want to hear ""Who dat? Who dat? Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints? Who dat? Who dat?" again. Ever. Seriously. The guy next to me (left) was ornery as hell. He became more and more friendly as he consumed more and more beer. I think his wife grew jealous because as he got drunker and drunker he kept hugging me (something I don't like strangers to do). She was pregnant and he was very happy I gave her my fries when she got tired of the glacial concession lines. On the right side I had two Eagles fans. I mentioned my long-suffering friend Tom and we talked Jeff Feagles, Pumpy Tudors, and Donovan McNabb.

Q: Why is Donovan McNabb always shown eating his Campbells Chunky Soup straight from the can?
A: Because he chokes every time he gets close to a Bowl!

Thanks to the Eagles fan for that fine joke. Halftime was The Who in a spectacular light, laser, and fireworks show. Evan and I took lots of pictures and I'm glad he did too because this is when my batteries died and replacing them in the dark was difficult. Two minutes may not sound long but for a ten minute show it is.

The Saints decided to play football the second half, thank the football gods. Their defense was still weak but overall it was a more balanced game. If their defense had played harder it could have been a blowout. I felt very detached from the whole game and it was a bit tiring since our entire section stood the entire game. As the game ended, with about 30 second to go, Evan and I headed down stairs trying to stay in sight of each other as we made our respective ways to the down ramp. We made it to the bottom of the stadium ramp at about 10pm and ran to the car. Because of some fancy and possibly illegal driving we got home before 11pm.

I'm tired so I'm not posting more but thought I'd get that first post out there.

Never Get Into A Battle of Wits With An Unarmed Opponent

2010-02-04T20:49:00.000-05:00

I'll say it again. Most hockey fans in South Florida are bags of wind who don't know shit. Some are very knowledgeable (Bill M) whose Facebook page this came from. Bill and I often agree and sometimes don't. But he knows what he's talking about. I've removed all last names except mine and the idiot I wish to mock. I've also removed posts unrelated to the topic at hand. But what's here is not edited.

A good fan of any sport will make impassioned statements of opinion. That's cool. You should. Sports journalism is somewhere you actually get to throw opinion into your story. I'm all for it, and when I wrote for LCS I did the same thing. However, if you're going to state something as a fact, you best be ready to back it up. And if you're going to issue a challenge, you better make sure you have it right.

I took umbrage at Shawn Morin's statement because it's a direct attack on me and my integrity. Fortunately, Shawn is a blowhard with, apparently, no hockey knowledge because he'd have kept his mouth shut if he had any. So I've marked in purple where he insults me. Now, you will see I have included opinions that do not agree with my own, because not everyone agrees with me. I don't mind that. But Shawn opened his mouth. Then, he throws down the gauntlet of a challenge also marked in purple. Conveniently, because he's a lazy fan, he didn't do any research at all. First, as a writer, I could use my own name as a legitimate reply to his absurdist statement. But, it so happens I had recently made fun of J-Blow's work ethic -- he's a lazy player, plain and simple, and his hockey sense is often weak -- and in that I had referred to a writer at CBS Sports who had the same opinion. That's a second writer and the one I used to shut his sorry ass up. Of course, that writer referred to another writer at TSN who also had similar comments.

So, Shawn Morin is the exact sort of sports fan that makes people in Florida look like asses. As much as I hate fans of the Rangers (or Leafs and so on), I just don't have this sort of problems with them. We never agree but I can have an intelligent conversation with them. It's sad because he's not alone. I'm picking on him because he happened to open his mouth and spew his ill-informed thoughts at me. I use the term "thoughts" loosely. I find hockey fans in this market to be generally either Pollyannas with no grip on reality, or worse blowhards full of 'facts' that just aren't facts. It's why most fans in our market are blasted, and they are right. I would like to offer up Shawn as a sacrifice.

Bill M: All you Panthers fans trashing Jay Bouwmeester and wishing him ill-will upon his return are playing right into his hand. I say kill him with kindness. Or better yet, indifference. Let's treat him like just another random visiting player. After all, that's all he is. We have much bigger concerns around here.
Evan B: Sorry Bill, we upgraded our seats in order to trash the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man.
Murphy B: I felt bad about sincerely wanting to boo him down the stretch last season when he tanked on us... I am booing him with a clear conscience tomorrow night. No disrespect meant to anyone.
Josh B: When he was a panther, he was a customer at the drycleaner I work at. He attempted to run me over with his pickup truck once because his suit had a stain we couldn't get out. Ever since then I've been booing him. Even when he was on the panthers
Brian M: Yeah but I would run ya over if I had the chance and you never touched my clothes lol. But to the point. Like him or not he is a very good player and was a big part of the good play we had last season. I'm with Bill on this one. Moving on like he did was just business.
Eric Seiden: @MurphyB unlike you My disrespect to J-Blow is intended and I'm proud of it. @BillM treating him like this is returning the favour he paid us by not making any effort to play in our playoff run @Brian, sorry dude. You're totally wrong. He's not a good player which makes the heckling feel all that much the better.
Shawn Morin: Eric if you don't think jay is a good defenseman then how can anyone take anything you say seriously... (There's where the idiot opens his mouth to insult me)
Dylan R: i think hes a great player.. but he is full of himself.. quit on the team.. as did Martin the GM last year did. cowardly acts. im sorry.. but .. .like any other fans or players that come to town.. hes gonna be another one to bite the dust as the song goes.
Bill M: I'm disagreeing with you that he "tanked" on us last season. That's ridiculous. Underachieved? Yes. But the whole team failed to come through under the pressure and the heated competition. Playing poorly on purpose would be a physically dangerous thing to do. I don't think he did that.
Eric Seiden: @Shawn, lots of people do. That you don't is your problem. However I don't feel the need to insult you. Jay's stats speak for themselves. Look 'em up. He's an underachieving, whiny, marshmallow. @BillM I didn't say he tanked. I said he didn't make any effort. In fact I can't say that he did anything.
Shawn Morin: Eric. Find me a hockey writer who thinks jay bouwmeester is a bad defenseman. And the panthers lost the playoffs in Nov-Dec last season. (Here's the idiot's challenge)
Eric Seiden: @Shawn URL HERE (There. CBS Sports. I accept your apology, Shawn.) If you want to argue hockey, we can. But Mr Murphy's blog isn't the place. There's plenty more to back my side but you said to find one. I didn't even need to look further than my OWN writings to find links. Oh, yeah, I was a sports writer for three years. BTW, Brown's article links to others.

Yeah, so there ya' go. The nice thing about a personal blog is I get to rip on idiots. Shawn Morin is an idiot. I've stopped reading that thread and I certainly apologize to BillM for anything in that which may have bothered him. In theory, Shawn is his friend which is why I walked away after my last post. Unfortunately, I should have never gotten into a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent. (Yeah, never piss off a writer, especially one with an audience. Ask Alan Price.)

I heard back from Roto-Rooter today. I got a very, very long apology. They explained what went wrong and said they'd be willing to send someone out at a specific time. I declined -- had they offered me a hefty discount I might have reconsidered. I explained "never again" means what I said. What I did find commendable was that they actually listened to the recorded conversations that I had. They know what went wrong and who was responsible. And they definitely agree that their response to "I'm calling to cancel" which was "okay" was most certainly not okay. They thanked me for complaining so they could fix it so nobody would ever go through that again, and we had a brief discussion about the SuperBowl.

Speaking of the SuperBowl I have a ticket. I am going. No idea why I'm putting myself through that ordeal, but I will have fun. Especially if the Colts lose. Geaux Saints (dedicated to CAT).