The Wienermobile Dogs My Steps This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

I am avoiding packing by wasting time on today's blog post. At least I have a cool experience to relate. I saw, live and in person, the legendary Wienermobile. Words and photos do not do justice to the awesomeness that it represents. The Wienermobile has been an obscure icon until raised to legendary status by Dave Barry, the pullet-surprise Pulitzer Prize winning columnist, and thanks to the Internet, you can even read it here before the lawyers make it go away. I took three photos with my mobile phone.

It's times like this I actually wish my mobile phone didn't have a shit camera. Still, it's better than nothing.

In other news, here's a picture of Gatwick taken today as part of a SkyNews story:

That certainly looks like a White Christmas to me.

I got a Google Alert today, as I often do, when my name appears somewhere new in the Google search engine. Most of those entries are either not me (the photographer, the stock scam artist, the musician, and so on) or updates to profiles at various sites. Today's match was a site that estimates the worth of your site based on your site's Google rank. It said darsys.net was worth about $48,000 (hahahaha) and darsys.com was worth $42,000 (still laughing), and my work is worth $40,000. I am not sure what the scam is but it has to be one since they think panthershockey.net is worth $45,000 and Umbrella Hat Society is worth $49,000. I know the traffic levels of these sites and relative worth of that traffic. Those numbers are absolute rubbish and meaningless. But it's fun, so plug in your own site. I was unable to get any site below $40,000 no matter how obscure. If anyone wants to buy my domains for that sum of money, let's talk. (I've typed in domains that don't even exist and get random numbers in the $40k to $50k range.)

I want to thank Dan for this URL which is a compendium of cool signs from the Tokyo subway. This is for Liz and Maury especially because I know you'll appreciate it being subway geeks like me. The site is in Japanese and will not display properly if you don't have the appropriate character set installed, but if you click on each picture you get a larger version with English on it as well. The blue box under each picture is the "back" button. This isn't a joke URL and is the real Tokyo Metro official website which makes it all the more double-plus awesome.

Everyone needs a story of revenge. I am not referring to Kenny, either. I've mentioned LameBook before but this is the best post I've ever seen there. Maybe one of the best anywhere. It's just perfect. I want to be friends with this guy. He's awesomely clever. It's the perfect crime.

I have discovered I have been blocked by someone I thought was my friend. Most confusing. Her loss I suppose. Today is the first day of winter. I guess that's appropriate.

A long Diatribe and some updates This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

First, I must say, the Panthers are sucking so bad, it's embarrassing. They are a train wreck. How bad is it? Legendary fan and media-whore VanMurph finally thew a fit over it and has jumped in with the rest of us who are saying what the fuck is wrong with this team?

You know, many of us have been suffering a long time. I'm a charter season ticket holder so I remember not only the bad times but even some of the good times. We did. after all, make it to the Stanley Cup finals, losing in one of the longest hockey games in history. (That story is the subject of my We Believe article.) Over the years me, and most of my long-suffering friends and brethren have become negative, bitter, cynical, and sarcastic with regards to the team. There's really no other alternative -- that's how you end up.

Some of the newer fans have wondered why we long-suffering fans are like this. They are now experiencing first hand what our years of dedication have proven. And it's frustrating to watch your team have yet another collapse. We've seen these collapses through various coaches, GMs, and a whole slew of players. There's only been one constant: Alan Cohen.

If I had one year to run this team, I'd make changes. I don't think I could fix it in one year. Let me be blunt. The first one out the door would be Michael Yormark (I hope he's reading this). He's sold the soul of the team to the highest bidder. If you're in our arena, you wouldn't even know a hockey team played there. This has been mentioned to me time and time again. I could tell you about the banners that no longer grace our halls, the fact our building has almost nothing resembling team colours, and the whole arena is a paean to advertising. I get that you have to sell ads to make a team profitable, but this is a guy who has our own team's logo on an ad in a urinal. When I have to piss, I have to piss on my OWN TEAM'S LOGO. He should be fired for that alone.

The players who don't give a shit would be gone. Bye-bye Jay Bouwmeester, the most overrated player on our team this decade. You don't care and neither do I. I'd rather take it up the arse than let you play another shift. The coach would be instructed to bench anyone who didn't play, pretty much guaranteeing half the team would be sitting whilst call-ups would be on the ice. I'd rather lose a hard-fought hockey game than sit through the shite I've seen the past few weeks. Abhorrent at best.

I like DeBoer as a coach but he's blowing it badly. From the Boynton fiasco to not playing Andy. It's ugly. If he doesn't correct the cranial-rectal inversion, he's got to go too. And I don't want him to go. I wonder if he's under constraints from management?

The bottom line is VanMurph is a homer of the best -- some might say worst -- sort. A blindly loyal fan who overlooks almost anything. These are the sort of fans you need to make a team survive. Our team just lost him. That tells you how bad we are. I like VanMurph and what he brings to the game. If you can't keep the fans like him, how are you going to keep people like me who've been living and breathing this team since our very first opening night. The worst thing is, the team is so damned blind to what's happening, they don't get it. Even our players see it. Don't believe me? Ask 'em. I have. And not just the current batch, this goes back.

*** END PANTHER RANT ***

Also, I want to commend the Onion for their excellent spot on breast cancer awareness and what one brave pair of scouts is doing to help. Anyone who doesn't get it and comments or emails me about this will be pilloried -- you might wish to check what the Onion is about if you don't know.

And special kudos to the fine lady who's been stealing boob jobs. No, really. I am not making this up as Dave Barry would say. A serial 'Boob-Job Bandit' .... caught stealing cosmetic surgery procedures totalling more than £8,000. The 30-year-old blonde was tracked down by police using a serial number on her removed breast implants. Read more at Metro. I mean you all just are curious about this aren't you?

Special kudos to the TV show Lost. Last night's episode had their finest "A" game going on. The last few minutes with Sayid and Ben were some of the best dramatic moments I have ever seen on television. I don't want to spoil it, but WOW. A perfect ten moment. I've been totally gobsmacked before and not seen something coming, then looked back and said "Yeah, I guess I did see that coming." Not last night. Perfect episode. Even Heroes sucked less than usual this week.

And a random thing for a certain friend who's a parent to be who is wrestling with a certain decision: read this.

Lastly, I had previous reported on the 12 year old boy who fathered a kid and was much publicized about it. He's not the father according to a paternity test and some 15 year old kid is, though nearly a dozen teens claimed to have slept with the slag. That's so much better. Not.

Dave Barry This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

I flew to Las Vegas this past Monday for a pair of conventions (yawn) and also to see the new Cirque show Love (more later). I was standing in line to board and I thought to myself "the back of this guy's head looks awfully familiar." He turned briefly to hand his boarding card to the gate agent, and it was Dave Barry. After I cleared through, I caught up and said "hi" -- he didn't remember me right away, but he did after a few moments. I then left him alone, because I don't want to be a pest. Imagine my surprise when I find out my seatmate is, of all people, Dave.

We chat* a bit prior to take off and we both find the woman behind us insanely irritating because she and her seatmate are doing the crossword puzzle from the inflight magazine. Only they're doing it at a volume that is more conducive to watching a sporting event. We roll eyes at each other and he finally says something along the lines of "If you strangle her, I won't see anything." A tempting offer, but I decide against it and show him my Bose Quiet Comfort headphones -- but even they can't drown her out totally.

He's working on a new book -- I ask him what it's about, and he tells me*. I had a few other questions but mostly he wrote and I read. Neither of us ate the plane food. We both ate the hot nuts. We both had beverages. And that is the generic description.

I fired off an e-mail to Rob because I thought it was cool I should run into his dad on a plane. Slim odds. And I'm looking forward to the new book.





* The nature of our discussions shall not concern you except as noted :)

Peter and the Shadow Thieves (Review) This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

Peter and the Shadow Thieves has finally been released and now I've read it. If you read and liked the previous entry in this series Peter and the Star Catchers, you'll also like this book as well. If you didn't, you just might like this anyway.

As prequels to JM Barrie's famous Peter Pan, they have some limitations. This one, though, is freed of the first novel's need to end up at a certain place in time. At least that's my take. I liked this one a bit better. The plot was more interesting, and it was less of a child's book. Even Mr. Barrie himself has a cameo in this one, though if you're not paying attention you might not realize that's what it is.

Like all children's books this one is a bit predictable but I don't fault the authors because in general that's how the genre plays out. The book's a bit short on character development but it makes up for it in atmosphere and plot.



Tag: Book and Review and Peter Pan and Dave Barry

Dave Barry on Permanent Hiatus This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

In my original blog post a year ago I mentioned Dave Barry was going on hiatus and said he'd announce more after a year. I predicted this hiatus would probably be permanent. Today he announced that it would, indeed, be permanent. The newswire story says it all. Or read the official interview and statement if you prefer.

I am angry that I cannot read 'new' Dave anymore, but I am happy that he's doing something that makes him happy. I guess we call it mixed emotions. Good luck to Dave. I guess we're all stuck buying books from now on, not that it's a bad thing.

Dave, we hardly knew ye'

Happy New Year -- Bye Bye Barry This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

Hello Loyal Reader[1]:

First, and foremost, I'd like to wish everyone who reads this blog a very Happy New Year. I'm posting this a day late because I was too tired yesterday to deal with a blog entry.

I am recovering from California's horrible loss to Texas Tech. At least we did it in the Holiday Bowl[2] where nobody really watched it instead of in the Rose Bowl where we'd have been mercilessly trashed by the press.

I also wish to send out condolences to the victims of the Tsunami because it's a huge tragedy. Help survivors and their families by making monetary donations to these organizations:

• American Red Cross International Response Fund
• AmeriCares South Asia Earthquake Relief Fund
• Direct Relief International International Assistance Fund
• Médecins Sans Frontières International Tsunami Emergency Appeal
• Oxfam Asian Earthquake & Tsunami Fund
• Sarvodaya Relief Fund for Tsunami Tragedy
• Save the Children Asia Earthquake/Tsunami Relief Fund
• UNICEF South Asia Tsunami Relief Efforts

Be sure and mark your donation to be used towards Tsunami relief efforts

Lastly, today marks the end of an era. Dave Barry's last weekly column was printed. He'll be missed by me and many of my friends who read his columns and often had liquid coming out of our noses in laughter. I know he says he might write a column if a cow explodes in a boat toilet, so I would encourage someone to do just that. He says he might come back, but I doubt it. He will continue to write books (yay) and the occasional column on topics that interest him.

Well that's it for this blog entry. I've got lots of big news coming in the next few weeks so you should check back soon.

Cheers,
Eric


[1] I assume I've got one. If there's more than one of you, add an "S" to the end. Somehow I doubt that's a reality.
[2] I will leave my rant about the f***ing BCS out of this post. Know that the BCS is almost as popular among Cal fans as several international terrorists.

The Dave Retires This blog has moved to http://quagmire.darsys.net

I am sad to report the leader of all Barryons, our icon, the Dave himself has announced he's going on indefinite hiatus today. I'm crushed and sad. I'd like to rail on about how insensitive and selfish he's being, but hat would be insensitive and selfish. Instead, I wish him the very best of luck in his future endeavours. I'm sure he'll do great.

I know he's going to keep writing books (YAY!) and finish up his current movie (um, well, at least he's writing books). I'm sure he'll spend more time with his family and that's good too. I hope he's made provisions for the eternally invaluable and entirely irreplaceable judi.

Not sure what else to say, I'm sure as you all wake up and read the Herald you'll find out as well.

-- E